June 16, 2008

Wildwood Boardwalk Burns

I went down the shore over the weekend -- to Wildwood, of course, because Wildwood is awesome and if you disagree you're wrong. On Saturday, wildfires from North Carolina and Virginia somehow created a haze on the beaches down the shore. "It smells like cedar," some dude told the Press of Atlantic City. Neat!

And, then, just this morning, a three-alarm fire broke out under Mariner's Landing in Wildwood, requiring 200 firefighters to get the blaze under control. I was in Wildwood over the weekend; fire in Wildwood Monday morning. Coincidence? Well, of course. The Boardwalk of Fame and Happiness (this is an actual sign) doesn't just catch fire because I went for a visit, ate at Sam's Pizza and learned that spray-on sunscreen doesn't work as well as the regular stuff.

Today's fire wasn't quite as tragic as the one that leveled Castle Dracula six years ago; the only rides that were damaged were the Super Scooter and the Seal Flume (which are probably kids' rides). Ha ha, kids, looks like we grownups win again!

Posted by D-Mac at 08:54 AM | Comments (3)

May 22, 2008

Wildwood #1 Beach In Worthless Online Poll

In a big eff-you to a bunch of my high school friends who always whined that the Wildwood beach was "too long," the monstrosity was voted New Jersey's best beach by some sort of poll, meaning it was 100 percent factual. The poll was also online, which totally ups that even higher somehow.

Wildwood actually bested not only both Wildwood Crest and North Wildwood, despite the former having the advantage of fewer annoying people and the latter having the advantage of no curfew for people under 18, though the beach is closed by then anyway.

The tourism board was angry that some shore resorts jumped the gun on announcing their top-10 status; somehow, Wildwood was first, the Crest second, Ocean City third and North Wildwood fourth. Guh?

Also, Asbury Park was sixth, which I can no doubt say is 100 percent the result of Bruce Springsteen. And, yes, it's now shore season, which is really all this poll was designed to remind you of anyway.

Voters picks for top-10 beaches [AP/Philly.com]

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May 20, 2008

Shore Season Approaching, Is No Different

NBC 10 also reported yesterday on the shore, which will be super-crowded this weekend thanks to Memorial Day. The price of a slice of pizza is up -- oh no! -- at Sam's Pizza in Wildwood, though it's only going from $1.75 to $1.90. Eh, that ain't so bad.

And also the Morey's Pier rollercoaster, The Great Noreaster, has a new name -- and boy is it clever:

Just in time for summer, Morey's Surfside Pier in North Wildwood is putting a new spin on one of its most popular rides. "It's the Great Nor'easter, which we're now calling 'Fly the Great Nor'easter,'" Morey Organization Vice President Geoff Rogers said.

Oh, I see, they put "Fly" in front of it. Like that Sugar Ray song! After two winter trips to Atlantic City, I really can't wait to get down the shore when the sun is shining and I can actually go in the ocean.

Roller Coasters, Pizza Costs, Gas Giveaways Shaking Up Shore [NBC 10]

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April 22, 2008

Boardwalk Merchants Encourage Voting

Citizen Mom went down the shore over the weekend and spotted this wall of incredible bootleg t-shirts on the Wildwood boardwalk, including shirts for Obama, Clinton and even creepy old John McCain. The "Osama for Obama" one begs the question: No "Barry Hussein" shirts?

This Could Be A Very Long Summer [Citizen Mom]

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October 24, 2007

Pro Wrestlers Stronger Than Singers, Study Finds

Congratulations to the Atlantic City Press for the lead of the day:

WILDWOOD - Imagine WWE Raw superstar Umaga [at right, apparently--dmac] taking on 1950s singing sensation Little Anthony and the Imperials.

Chances are Umaga, the 350-pound heavyweight, could make quick work of the group with the aid of his famed Samoan Spike.

In another Press lead today, we learn that Atlantic City's acting mayor does not have two heads, he merely has one.

Atlantic City's acting mayor is one head wearing two hats [Press of AC]
Fifties Weekend sets Wildwoods Convention Center attendance record [Press of AC]

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October 08, 2007

There Is One Sign Summer Is Officially Over

It may be 80 degrees out, but, sadly, it's not July. That's the worst: too-hot summer weather without the laziness of summer.

Aw. Personally, though, I always preferred Sam's.

Columbus Day [Citizen Mom]

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August 21, 2007

Personally, If It's Not Beanie Babies I'm Not Interested

There was a big flea market over the weekend in Wildwood, and all the stars were out. And by stars, I mean "memorabilia dealers."

Not all memorabilia dealers are the same, though. Apparently they don't quite "get" each other. Looking at a woman selling rare DVDs (huh?), a sports card dealer pounces.

Across the room, dealer Wayne Hitchens, of Bethany Beach, Del., watched over his vast array of baseball cards, trading cards and other collectibles. "It surprises me anybody would buy anything over there," Hitchens said, referring to nearby stalls selling plastic dolls and toys.

Hitchens specializes in rare finds. His booth featured distinctive trading cards, including several from the War Gum series with the likes of Winston Churchill or scenes such as one marked "Filipinos Destroy 154 Jap Boats."

Indeed! Why would you buy a DVD, when you could buy "Filipinos Destroy 154 Jap Boats"?

Wildwood collectibles show proves people will buy anything [Press of Atlantic City]

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July 02, 2007

Wildwood Finally Gets Rid Of Pesky Beach Sand

One of the best things about going down the shore is, obviously, the beach. But the worst part of the beach is the all the damn sand. If only there was a way to avoid all that sand while walking down to the ocean.

Fortunately for us, the good folks in Wildwood have spent $80,000 making sure we don't have to deal with all that sand.

Wildwood redevelopment director Lou Ferrara says all of the walks should be in place by July Fourth: “Unlike most beaches in New Jersey, we have plenty of sand. There’s about 1,800 feet of sand from the boardwalk to the water, and a lot of people have difficulty getting to the water with their coolers and their chairs and their children.”

I know the sand gets hot, and Wildwood has ridiculously long beaches, but, uh, what? They could have just given me $80,000 and I would have carried everyone to the water.

New Wooden Walkways Added to Wildwood Beaches [KYW 1060]

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May 29, 2007

The Shore: So Tacky It's Awesome

There's an Associated Press story in Metro today about all the different rules the different South Jersey shore communities have. In Wildwood, for example, camels are banned from the beach. Mayor Ernie Troiano: "Our beaches are as wide as a desert, but you won't find any camels on our sand." Hopefully, that is Wildwood's new motto.

Meanwhile, in Surf City you can't dig deep in the sand because the township isn't sure if the unexploded munitions found on the beach were all removed.

"How can you tell a kid not to dig in the sand?" asked Faith O'Dell, who lives near the beach in Surf City, where most of the old fuses and such were found. "It's their nature; it's what kids do. And when your kid says, 'Why, Mommy, why can't I dig in the sand,' what do you tell them, that they could blow themselves up?"

Yeah, that's exactly what you tell 'em. You say: "Don't dig in the sand, son, or you'll die." Scare 'em into submission. But while some were lamenting the munitions found on the beach, one entrepreneur was loving it:

Presiding over a busy cash register, a jubilant Joe Muzzillio, owner of Exit 63 Wearhouse, reported his best Memorial Day weekend ever.

"It was definitely busier than usual for me," Muzzillio said. "I came out with these T-shirts that I can't keep on the racks."

Muzzillio motioned to a display of shirts printed with "Surf City Bomb Squad," "Surf City's a Blast," and "I Got Bombed in Surf City" – which cost $8.99 to $14.99 and came in various styles, including a cute pink camouflage style for women.

Wait, did he do "I Got Bombed in Surf City"? Oh, oh, he did.

Thou shalt not [AP/Metro]
In Surf City, the goal was to have a blast [Philly.com]

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April 09, 2007

Activists Again Attempt To Ruin Fun

You know what you don't want to think about next time you're strolling along the boardwalk in gorgeous 75-degree weather? The boards you're stepping on are from the rapidly-shrinking Brazilian rain forests! And you're doing your own special part to participate in the systematic destruction of our planet's ecosystem by buying a "I'm not as think as you drunk I am" t-shirt on the boards.

Yep, that's certainly not the feeling you want when you drive two hours to Wildwood or Ocean City for a little R&R or an easy one-night stand opportunity. Well, too late, suckers! Next time you're down there you're going to think about how you're walking on Brazilian wood. Hey, maybe the wood was even assembled by sweatshop workers! Well, I don't really know that would work, so I guess not.

Brazilian wood is valued due to its durability -- it can support cars driving on the boards, be it police or drunk drivers -- longevity and attractiveness. But, surprise!, environmental activists don't want Brazilian wood used, because it hurts the planet to use it or something.

Ocean City has attempted to buy $1.2 million of "responsibly-harvested" rainforest wood, but didn't get any bids because they requested the wood not be cleaned with puppy guts or whatever.

And, yes, there's a global warming tie-in, says OC environmentalist Georgina Shanley:

"Ocean City is a very vulnerable barrier island," she said. "By us taking 1,000 acres of rain forest now, we're becoming part of global warming and rising seas. We're actually making our own island vulnerable to flooding in future years. It's very shortsighted."

That's Ocean City's problem. Fortunately for Wildwood, if sea levels rise like 20 feet the beach will still be 800 meters long, down from its current length of 8 miles.

Boardwalk wood sets off debate in Ocean City [Camden Courier-Post]
March 8: Woman In AC Did Not Watch The Tram Car

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December 12, 2006

Leftovers: No Tickets, Please

• This summer, Morey's Piers will be switching to a plastic card system instead of tickets. The inspiration was apparently that annoying ad where the entire food court explodes because one man pays with cash. Um, yay? [Press of Atlantic City]

• Heroin is not just a problem in Philadelphia; it's spread to northeastern Pennsylvania, too, complete with fentanyl-laced overdoses. Here's a solution: T-shirts! [Daily News]

• The Inquirer and Daily News have dueling Atlantic City hooker stories today. The Inky's George Anastasia goes with a woman who may have been with the man who killed four women and the Daily News' Simone Weichselbaum has a nice piece about how prostitutes are segregated by class. Key line comes from a prostitute named Heaven: "I'm a ho. I'm not that different. But I'm not a crackhead ho. So I'm not that bad."

‣ And, finally, our city's skyline likes to light up. Of course. [Inquirer]

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October 31, 2006

Alas Poor Yorick -- He Ran The Ferris Wheel

Jellyfish, seaweed, trash, syringes and now skulls.

Yes, you never know what you're going to find on the beaches of Wildwood.

Britt Wetzel found a human skull -- likely an adult female -- yesterday in North Wildwood while fishing. Another beachgoer called police. Wetzel gave this account to the Press of Atlantic City:

“There was definitely a creep factor. My reaction was definitely creeped out."

Police are investigating the crime, but Wetzel has his opinions:

“The first thing we thought was, ‘This is definitely something from an unsolved mystery,'” Wetzel said.

Thanks, gumshoe.

Human skull found on Cape beach [Press of AC]

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October 25, 2006

Giant Drink Tumbler Just What Wildwood Needed

In case you were wondering if Wildwood could get even more condo-fied, well, you're in luck. The answer's yes, and the results are... well... that thing at right (click to enlarge).

The monstrosity at right is none other than the Wildwood Beach Hotel & Resort, slated for completion in 2009. It'll sit directly across from the Wildwood Convention Center, which puts it at around Ocean & Montgomery. It's not the only new high rise going in on the tiny island. The Atlantic City Press reports that Wildwood recently raised its height maximum -- 12 stories -- allowing this 25-story resort as well as a bunch of other high rises that already have city approval. (There may be an issue clearing some of the high rises with the state's Department of Environmental Protection, because of bird migration patterns or something.)

But back to the Wildwood Beach Hotel & Resort. It's clearly positioning itself as a year-round destination, since it will feature a spa, indoor shopping, an indoor beach and wave pool (!) and a convenient hop, skip and jump to the Convention Center. (The website also calls Wildwood's sand "finer than any you'll find in the Caribbean." There's more kids' urine in it, too.)

The design is pretty good up top, with the yellow and oldish motel look. But, uh, giant drink tumbler? Giant lava lamp? Guhwha? It'd look nice and even appropriate without the giant tumbler and lava lamps, but with them, it's... uh... is there a stronger word than kitschy?

Of course, the $225 million, 190-condo, 150-hotel room resort isn't just about making money. No, it's about helping families victimized by 9/11, according to Christian Nickerson (the head of developer Princeton Junction Development Partners):

"As a survivor of the 9/11 attack on Tower One of the World Trade Center, I believe people think differently about travel," Nickerson says. "Many families would like to have a taste of the Caribbean without the hassles of airport security, passports and a long plane ride. Even in winter, visitors would be able to relax at our indoor beach."

Oh. Well. God bless your resort, then, Christian. But if your indoor shopping forces the Boardwalk Mall to close, well, there will be hell to pay. There's a bunch of links below if you want further info on the de-Wildwoodification of Wildwood.

Wildwood Beach Hotel & Resort
Holy Cow, Batman, Wildwood's Never Gonna be the Same! [Phillyblog]
Coming 2009: Wildwood Condos! Plus Waterpark! And 9/11 Exploitation! [New York Observer Real Estate Blog]
Wildwood developers look to sky [Press of Atlantic City]
Developers Unveil $225M Hotel/Condo Project [Globe St.]

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September 28, 2006

Leftovers: Whale Watching

• A whale has washed up on the shores of Wildwood Crest, leaving the town's current Autumn population of 15 shocked. [NBC 10]

• The dance-off for jobs at the Philly Park casino continues, with the applicants now comparing it to American Idol. This idea's a little wacky, but I'm all for replacing getting signatures with dancing to "YMCA" as a way to get on the ballot. [Bucks County Courier Times]

• Be sure to check out the New York Post's top 10 reasons why TO would want to kill himself list! It has all the hilarity of a root canal performed without novocaine by a labrador retriever who's also urinating on you. [Gawker]

• For you statheads (ok, for me personally), here's a listing of the Eagles' ranking in alternate football statistics from Football Outsiders. [Scrapple]

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August 21, 2006

Cougars Spotted In Wildwood, Easy Jokes Made Up And Down East Coast

Once every few months, someone will spot a cougar in the area. Remember the cougar in Philadelphia in the mid-1990s? He was everywhere! And everyone's dad's brother's friend had seen him!

It's been a while since the last sighting -- late May by our best count -- so, naturally, a cougar was spotted in Wildwood recently by a Wilkes-Barre man. (Shown here is said cougar waiting to board the tram car. Hey, the Wildwood boardwalk is long.)

Corey Daly Sr. said he spotted the big cats on the beach, about 80 yards off the boardwalk, in North Wildwood. Officials are unconvinced -- the last confirmed cougar sighting in the area was in Delaware in the 1990s, and that was from a drug dealer who kept it as a pet. (But of course.) There's no word as to how cougars could even get to Wildwood, which is an island. Do you think they took Route 9 or NJ Transit?

That hasn't stopped the news media from picking it up (as they should, natch) and from everyone who's heard the story thinking about the joke they're going to tell at the bar this weekend when the story comes up. But, hey, easy jokes are our steez, man, so let's do this: Cougars? In Wildwood? Geeze, and Sea Isle seemed so much more likely.

Hunter claims he saw 2 cougars in Wildwood [Inky]
Cougar (slang) [Wikipedia]
Archives: Cougars

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August 01, 2006

Down The Shore: Sam's Pizza Lives

Last year, Sam's Pizza on the Wildwood boardwalk burnt down in a fire that started in a motel behind it.

Those of us who grew up going to Wildwood every summer figured that Sam's would join Dracula's Castle as an old Wildwood landmark that had burnt down and never returned. (In 2002, some teenagers managed to burn down Castle Dracula during Wildwood's off-season. Bastards.)

Oh, ho ho, not so fast, said the Sam's Pizza owners, who have rebuilt the restaurant to twice its size and are still producing the best pizza on the Boardwalk, if not the world. The place is still packed and, now that Wildwood has its best pizza -- right across from Curly's Fries -- all is right with the world again.

Amen.

Endless Summers for Shore Businesses [Inquirer]
Wildwood Digs Out From Historic Fire [NBC 10]
Tribute to Castle Dracula [X-Entertainment]

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July 31, 2006

Down The Shore: Wildwood Finally Hits 1995

Headline in last week's Press of Atlantic City shore guide:

Don't laugh; this actually makes sense. Wildwood just stopped playing "Rhythm is a Dancer" last summer. Getting to Live was a logical next step.

Live brings new era of uplifting rock to Wildwood [Press of AC]

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June 13, 2006

North Wildwood: Combine Alcohol With Swimming For Bonus Down The Shore Fun! Only 156 Tickets!

It's almost the middle of June, and with the official start of summer quickly approaching, we'll all be heading down the shore for at least a day or two in the coming months. And whether your choice of south Jersey beaches is Avalon, Ocean City, Stone Harbor, Sea Isle, Cape May, Cape May Court House, or wherever, you know that for the trashiest fun possible, you have to go to Wildwood.

This year, North Wildwood has decided to trash up its act a little bit by allowing Morey's Piers to open up a bar at its water park. Yes, Morey's Surfside Pier at 25th Ave. (the one everyone calls "Morey's Pier") has renamed Raging Waters and turned it into an adult playground.

The new Ocean Oasis is essentially the same thing as the old Raging Waters, with slides and a kids' area and the lazy river. But there is one exception: The bar. And the pool tables. And chess and backgammon. Oh, and did we mention the serving of alcohol at a water park on the pier?

And people wonder why some of we native Philadelphians have an attachment to Wildwood. C'mon.

Bonus: According to this article, when the alcohol license was still pending, there was a group calling itself "Families Opposing Waterpark Liquor," or FOWL.

One Seashore Town Allows Water Parks to Serve Alcohol [KYW 1060]
North Wildwood facility seeks OK to serve alcohol [Camden Courier Post]

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May 26, 2006

Enjoy The Weekend

Okay, it's the day before a three-day weekend. (Yeah, I'm taking off Monday, too.) There's nothing going on. Sigh. And the Wi-Fi bill was just signed yesterday. (Seriously, I think Des Moines, Iowa, is going to be bathed in a wireless network before we are.)

But, let's end with this: By my calculations, Johnny Goodtimes has now been mentioned more in Metro than on any other media site, including his own website. (And, amazingly, even more than here.)

Anyway, have a good weekend. Enjoy the holiday. A favor: If you're going to Wildwood, could you let me know if they rebuilt Sam's Pizza yet? Can't believe that place burnt down. (Where else are you going to eat, Mack's? Please.) We'll return you to your regularly scheduled programming Tuesday. We can only hope there are mascots.

Update: Some internet searching has revealed that Sam's might indeed be opening this weekend!

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May 11, 2006

Doo Wop Motels: They Only Sound Offensive

Yesterday, the National Trust for Historic Preservation released its list of the 11 most endangered places, which is basically a list of 11 old buildings/types of buildings that are in danger of being torn down.

Some of them are fairly obvious: Oh, really, the historic neighborhoods of New Orleans are threatened? But one of the items on the list is one that strikes right to the heart of anyone who grew up in Philadelphia (unless you went to Ocean City instead): Wildwood's Do Wop Motels.

Doo Wop Motels -- build in the middle of the 20th century and named after the 50s style of music -- are usually colorful, L- or bar-shaped buildings characterized by sharp angles and "funky signage." The motels look like Americans thought the future would look like in the 1950s, i.e. The Jetsons. (The one in the photo is a more muted example of the style.)

Over the past few years, about 100 of these motels have been demolished to make way for -- ta da! -- condos, as Wildwood goes upscale. (Ha. That sounds funny.) Anyway, the ways to save the Doo Wop motels are currently "donate to the Doo Wop Preservation League" and "stay in a Doo Wop motel," both of which make sense, I suppose.

Even though I can't come up with a better reason than "They remind me of my childhood vacations," I still think the Doo Wop motels should be saved. I mean, what other resort town can give you a night at a kitschy hotel for only about $100? (Probably more; it's been a while.) When the trashy resort towns aren't so trashy anymore, what fun is that?

Doo Wop Motels [NTHP]

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February 01, 2006

Sharks (for jumping) invade Wildwood

Looks like you're going to have to go to Seaside Heights from now on, middle class families of the Northeast.

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