February 06, 2008

Locals Try Futile Attempts At Voting

Philadelphians put their best feet forward yesterday and attempted to vote in the Most Important Election Ever Between A Black And A Woman. Only problem: Pennsylvania's primary isn't until April 22.

But, still, the city's most informed residents lined up to vote yesterday, apparently confused by the media into thinking their votes counted. They usually don't count anyway, but this time nobody could even get a chance to pretend it did.

It was among the first of more than 400 calls from people who thought it was Election Day in Philadelphia, according to workers in the city commissioners office. "We've been telling people the only way they can vote is to get in their car and drive to Jersey," joked Tim Dowling, a campaign finance specialist in the office.

"We were very patient and explained [that] there was a primary in New Jersey but not here," said another worker who asked not to be identified.... Most people were very polite; they apologized for calling. But some of them insisted, they knew it was Election Day and they were going to vote. So we told them to go over the bridge."

Unfortunately, those who attempted to cross the bridge into New Jersey accidentally drove off the bridge. Election officials were counting a jump off the northern side as a vote for Hillary, and a jump off the southern side as a vote for Obama.

Don't feel bad, though, Philadelphians: This happened all over the country.

Sometimes voting 'don't come easy' [Daily News]

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October 29, 2007

Pa. To Be Attacked By Terrorists Next Week

On Friday, an Associated Press article revealed Pennsylvania wouldn't be revealing the list of polling places to voters (except online) due to fears of terrorism inspired by the 2004 Madrid train bombings.

On Friday, everybody laughed and laughed and laughed at Pennsylvania for not even trying to come up with a good excuse to attempt to get fewer Democrats to vote.

And then Ed Rendell decided the state was going to release a list of polling places. But nobody really cares, since everyone already laughed at Pennsylvania and moved on.

I'd wear a bulletproof vest on the first Tuesday in November, since terrorists are now going to be able to find out where you vote. The Taubenberger-Nutter election must not go off without a hitch!

In About-Face, Pa. to Release List of State Polling Places [KYW 1060]

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October 09, 2007

Register To Vote For Exciting Already-Decided Election

We are now less than a month away from the most exciting time of the year -- i.e. the election between midterms and presidential. Could those odd-year elections be any more exciting?

Oh, yeah, there's also a mayor's race in Philadelphia between the guy who's going to win (Michael Nutter) and the guy who's going to lose (Al Taubenberger). And don't forget the third-party candidates John Staggs (Socialist Workers, eligible to run for mayor, actually on ballot) and Larry West (independent, not eligible to run for mayor, not on ballot).

If you are very excited to vote for Mayor Al or meatpacker Staggs, be sure to note: Today is the last day you can register for the election in Pennsylvania. If you don't vote, nothing will happen, but you lose your right to complain about the guy you voted for who's not paying attention to your stupid pet causes.

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November 28, 2006

This Time, Your Vote Might Count

There is a tragedy in this year's This Year In Baseball Awards, and it is that Sal Fasano's incredible play of throwing the ball directly into the ground is not up for the award.

But we all know that Sal will win the award in spirit, and there's a chance to turn this baseball award show into something incredible. On a game that started at 11:05 and pretty much knocked the Phillies out of the playoffs, two baseball writers -- Dennis Deitch of the Delco Times and Ken Mandel of Phillies.com -- got to run in the President's Race.

The race features four presidents with giant heads who, uh, race around the baseball field. (Like the sausage race in Milwaukee, if you will.) And Ken Mandel, dressed as Thomas Jefferson, managed to fall, becoming the first person in the short history of the race to fall.

This is up for blooper of the year. I don't usually do much activism here, but this is something you can effect: Your vote might actually count. The other bloopers suck anyway. Vote for Thomas Jefferson's fall. Not doing so would just be un-American.

Full-size videos after the jump.

Continue reading "This Time, Your Vote Might Count"

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November 14, 2006

Leftovers: Bianca Ryan Well On Way To Catching Tupac

• Jonathan Takiff checks in with America's Got Talent winner Bianca Ryan today and finds her hard at work on her second album. Wait, how many albums did Janis Joplin record when she was alive? [Daily News]

• Live in Pennsylvania? All your road taxes are going up. And think, this report on transit was released just after the election. Who knew? [AP/6 ABC]

• Some voting machines in Bucks County and Montco featured a "No Vote" button, showing that you were all into the civic process, but all of the candidates running had the governing ability of a snail. Hey, can we get these for Philadelphia? [KYW 1060]

• Cherry Hill lands a deadly blow in the Cherry Hill vs. Smut war. Money quote: "They tear down the moral and spiritual fiber of America and should be banned." [Camden Courier-Post]

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October 09, 2006

Leftovers: Eagles 38, Cowboys 24

• So, the big story this afternoon is that... after losing the biggest game of the year so far... Cowboys wide receiver was upset and yelling! No! Never! [NBC 10]

• All the photos you need from yesterday's Biggest Game To Ever Happen, Ever. [The 700 Level]

• Public service announcement: You have to postmark your voter registration form before tomorrow night. So if you want to choose between Bob Casey and Rick Santorum -- oh, am I excited to make that decision! -- you better get to a state store, post office or library to get a form. [KYW 1060]

• Why is 10-time Congressman -- I like to refer to it as if they were winning something respectable, like a wrestling belt -- Curt Weldon having trouble in his re-election big? Gee, I dunno, I wonder what Curt Weldon could have done to make him unpopular. But, y'know, he does have it on good intelligence that Osama is dead, so you'd better vote for him. [Salon]

• Oh, yeah, and there's a giant hole in Broad Street at Lombard. So, uh, avoid that area.

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September 26, 2006

Leftovers: Philly Don't Get Your Gun

• Oh, the gun rally has made it to Harrisburg! Well, the people on buses. The people who tried to walk there are currently under arrest for attempting to get on the turnpike without a vehicle. [Inquirer]

• Speaking of gun violence, does the Inquirer have a hard-on for anti-gun advocates? I don't know. Will the paper's circulation increase if the editors do? [Classical Values]

• Penn students ask: Will Jannie Blackwell run? By the end of this mayoral race, there's going to be 270 people vying for the Democratic nomination. [Daily Pennsylvanian]

• There's not much time left to register to vote! But, don't worry, if you don't register in time, here's the little secret about voting that nobody wants you to know about: It doesn't matter if you do or not. Yes, PWD will be strongly against voting this year. I think it's the important issues that count. [Metroblogging]

• There's a 110-year-old man living in Florida who played Negro League baseball. And where was he from? Philly, naturally. Rock on, dude. [NYT]

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September 13, 2006

Del. Primary Is Democracy In Action!

Yesterday was Delaware's primary for Republican and Democratic nominees to the November elections, and, hot diggity dog, what a day it was!

The primary was moved from its usual Saturday time slot to a Tuesday one to allow Jewish voters to vote. But, apparently, there aren't many Jews in Delaware -- who knew? -- or they (and the rest of the state) decided that voting was for tools, because, well:

Despite clear skies and temperatures comfortably in the high 60s, most Delawareans didn't venture to the polls.

For statewide offices, Democratic voter turnout averaged 6 percent and Republican voter turnout was 8 percent, according to state election officials.

Sitting at a booth in Pike Creek's the Crossroads restaurant Tuesday morning, registered Democrats Jeannette and James Truax, of Newport, said they didn't know there was an election taking place.

But, hey, nobody lost or won by one vote, so it's okay, people.

Few bother to cast ballot in primary [Wilmington News-Journal]

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May 31, 2006

Blogicized: H-E-A-D-L-I-N-E-S L-I-K-E T-H-I-S A-R-E N-O-T C-L-E-V-E-R A-N-Y-M-O-R-E

• Over at A List Of Things Thrown Five Minutes Ago, they're liveblogging the preliminary rounds of the spelling bee. One kid actually got to spell Grimace as a word. The definition was, assumedly, "A big giant purple... corporate... spokes... thing... oh, whatever, you know how to effing spell Grimace." [A List Of Things Thrown Five Minutes Ago]

• In America, your vote counts. Except when it doesn't. With Bonus "Press 1 for Spanish" things to anger Joseph Vento! [The West End]

• The Fightin' Phils sure could use a pitcher. Everyone knows that. So why was their big offseason move -- besides the Thome trade -- to send Vicente Padilla (a starting pitcher!) to Texas?! Argh! [Phillies Nation]

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May 17, 2006

The Political Machine, Bisexuals And Dead Kittens: It Must Be The Primary!

I'll just come out and say it: Yesterday was the greatest primary in the history of Pennsylvania. I know, I've only been on this planet for 20-plus years, but I don't think any other primary voting could have topped yesterday.

Consider:

• The two top Republicans in the Senate -- Bob Jubelirer and Chip Brightbill -- were trounced yesterday. They both voted for the pay raise, which was, essentially, the reason they lost in the primary. And they outspent their opponents by huge margins. I think government is probably going to waste money in one way or another, but it's always kind of nice to see long-time incumbents knocked out of office. (Well, not nice for them.)

That's not the reason this is so good, though. Brightbill was running against Mike Folmer, and the Daily News' John Baer describes the final days of the race as such:

It included a last-minute TV ad involving a woman with whom Folmer admitted having a decade-old affair - a woman who later sued Folmer, claiming bad financial advice.

It also involved a charge from the Folmer camp suggesting Brightbill supporters might have killed a kitten, Twister, owned by Folmer's press aide.

Brightbill's spokesman dismissed the suggestion, saying, "I can't emphasize enough how much I love cats."

You see, rest of the state? This is why Philadelphia hates you (and why, in turn, you hate us). Our politics are stupid, ridiculous, over-the-top and annoying, but we rarely, if ever, kill kittens or accuse people of doing so.

• Speaking of Philadelphia, the hotly contested 175th District -- which had a three-way race and lots of fun arguing -- went to Mike O'Brien, who defeated Anne Dicker and Terry Graboyes. Graboyes, who was backed by Ed Rendell and Vince Fumo, actually finished third behind the progressive, bisexual Dicker, a fave of men, women and bloggers. Naturally, Graboyes said went off with a "I coulda been a contender, I coulda been somebody":

"If Anne Dicker hadn't been there, I would have trampled," she said. "And I will still never understand [why she ran]. Obviously it was more important to make her point than elect a progressive woman to the House."

Oh, wah wah. Oh, and I couldn't fit this in anywhere else, so I'm just going to throw it here: Voting for Dicker, who is bisexual (and married), is probably the closest most voters in the 175th will get to a threesome. (Rimshot.)

• The Democratic machine did possibly pull off an upset win in the 179th in North Philly, where the only candidate on the ballot (Tony Payton) might've lost to a write-in candidate (Emilio Vasquez), the fave of party leaders, who was knocked off when he failed to disclose his employer when filing his petitions. Sigh. Payton, naturally, is claiming people handing out stamps with Vasquez' name, which is -- surprise! -- illegal. (Correction: It's illegal if they're handed out inside the polling place; legal if it's 10 feet outside. But of course.)

• And, hey, Chuck Pennacchio lost, but he did beat Alan Sandals, who he was polling below (I think) prior to the primary. Of course, Bob Casey got 84 percent of the vote and will be taking on Rick Santorum in November.

Pennsylvania Election Results [AP/Philly.com]

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May 16, 2006

Blogicized: Happy Birthday To Youse

• Hey, a happy birthday to Blinq and its writer, Daniel Rubin, as it -- the blog, not the writer -- turns 1 today. As a prize, he gets to speak at Harvard, or something. [Blinq]

• Apparently, those touchpad voting machines are a little confusing. This is silly, since we should be able to figure out how to get people to vote without messing with their minds. Then again, this is America, and this is government. [PSoTD]

• I've gone a few days without reading an essay comparing bloggers to the Roman Legion. Then again, I've been paid to write this. (Even this pointless sentence here is earning me a very small, small, small amount of money!) [Classical Values]

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Hey, It's Election Day!

Hey, it is election day! And, depending on where you live, you might actually have a contested race in this primary. Since virtually every state legislator took the pay raise -- the real tricky ones voted against it and then took it -- the people have risen up! It's democracy in action! Whoo!

Well, until they all get trounced today and we have the same state representatives we've always had. But, hey, at least none of our current lawmakers kick kittens. As far as I know.

There's also a race for U.S. Senate, where state treasurer and noted mime Bob Casey faces a pair of upstart challengers that may, if they're lucky, combine for about 10 percent of the vote. However, in early exit polling, Chuck Pennachio leads Casey and Alan Sandals 100 percent to 0. Of course, I only polled Albert Yee. It is raining today, so there's a chance that only about 15 people will vote -- which usually bodes well for underdogs.

The biggest things on the ballot today are, of course, the two referendums we citizens of Philadelphia are being asked. The first question is kind of the same thing as the question last year, i.e. ethics board and no "pay to play" and all that jazz. I don't know why we need to be asked again, but, hey, whatever.

The other question concerns a proposal to put up cameras in "high-crime areas" so that the police might be able to catch criminals easier. As my only endorsement of this election, let me urge you to vote no on this. No, it's not the Big Brother stylings of it -- please, we're filmed everywhere we go -- it's that I know very well that the City of Philadelphia will have these cameras and somehow screw things up. Come on. You know a crook will commit a crime right in front of a camera, and a raccoon will have eaten the tape or something, and it'll be a mess.

Actually, that'd be kind of funny. Maybe you want to vote yes on that after all.

At Pa. polls, a moment of truth [Inky]

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February 20, 2006

Blogicized: Prime Meridian

• Fifteen years ago this Wednesday, One Meridian Plaza went up in flames, killing three firefighters. And today, construction began on a replacement condo tower (what else). Glad to see everyone worked really quickly on this one, really. [Changing Skyline]

• Instead of vetoing bad legislation -- I mean, really, if you needed an ID to vote there's absolutely no way I would remember it, and absolutely no way I would go back to the polling place after going home to pick it up, and I'm not that much more forgetful or lazy than the rest of the general population -- wouldn't it be awesome if he could just eat the bills? Oh, man, he'd totally clinch up re-election right then and there. [ACLU's Speaking Freely]

• The Phillies' secret weapon for next year isn't a front-line pitcher. (That would make too much sense.) It's former newsman Scott Palmer, the Phillies' newest PR guy. Start the parade down Broad Street! [PhilliesNation]

• And let's do some more Attytood love, since it's a very slow Presidents' Day: When Will Bunch just tears into his own paper -- even if it is just one of the columnists (and Christine Flowers at that) -- we should all thank God for the Internet, free speech, snark and American journalism. [Attytood]

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February 06, 2006

Elementary, my dear 'Metro'

Hey, Sherlock Holmes: Put this in your pipe and smoke it!

U.S. Editions [Metro]

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