December 29, 2006
Philadelphia Will Do Person Of The Year
The final announcement is close at hand, but I'm going to hold you in suspense until after the jump. While some favorites -- say, Terrell Owens -- did not make the list, I hope you are happy with the selections. Anyone you thought should have made the list was simply left off because I didn't feel like typing up what he or she had done throughout the year.
Okay, it's time to announce the Person of the Year. This person came to Philadelphia in 2006 with a track record that was a bit less than stellar.
Nonetheless, his 2006 arrival was greeted with cheers. He had devotees! He was beloved perhaps more than he had been in any other city. Then, mid-year, he packed his bags and left for a better job in New York. Is there anything that defines Philadelphia 2006 better?
Your 2006 Person of the Year is...
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PWD People Of The Year: Mark B. Cohen
Pennsylvania state representative and Mayor of the Internet Mark B. Cohen is our penultimate POTY honoree, earning his spot by being the most committed of our lawmakers to two things: (1) Reading and (2) Phillyblog.
Mark Cohen first made news this year when the Inquirer revealed he had spent just over $28,000 of taxpayer money on books and magazines the past two years. All legal, of course, but one wondered what exactly The Zen of Gambling and AOL For Dummies were doing for his constituents.
In addition to his addictive book habit, Cohen is one of the greatest healers of our time, as he told the Daliy News: "All over the country, people live longer lives because of me."
Although he's a hard-working state representative, Cohen's real role in life is Mayor of the Internet, a position he's used to propose a "World Phillyblog Day" in honor of the local messageboard and announcing how Phillyblog has gotten his 1000th member.
You know how politicians tend to pander to the hip, young Internet crowd with podcasts done by their staffers or favorite songs on iTunes or whatever? Well give Cohen this: He most certainly does not pander in terms of the Internet. He is totally, 100 percent into Phillyblog and the Internet. Whether this is scarier than a politician who panders to the Internet crowd is a question to leave up to the gods.
Despite his taxing job as Internet mayor, Cohen also returned to his legislative position in the fall when he got into a war of words with Brian Tierney, who used his rhetorical skills to achieve literary domination.
For being so into reading, Phillyblog and seniority of newspaper workers, Mark B. Cohen is are one of the People of the Year. Okay, mainly for just being into Phillyblog.
Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year | The List So Far
Archives: Mark B. Cohen
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PWD People Of The Year: Eddie Dougherty
For this, from Metro on May 1, at the height of the "gas is expensive" news cycle.
He is right, though. Gas prices should go down 18 percent. No, 25 percent.
Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year | The List So Far
Archives: Retired Lumberjacks Demand Lower Gas Prices
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PWD People Of The Year: Jennaphr Frederick, George Mallet, Dorothy Krysiuk, Kerri-Lee Halkett, Harry The Security Guy, Caitlin The Intern And All The Other Dancers And Mascots On Mascot Monday
It began with this. And somehow it exploded into all of this:
God bless you, Good Day Philadelphia.
Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year | The List So Far
Archives: Mascot Monday
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December 28, 2006
PWD People Of The Year: The Toe-Thumb Boy And A Newspaper Headline Writer
When Marlton's Zachary Buono's thumb and two other fingers were blown off by an M-80 in 2005, he didn't say goodbye to his thumb forever. No, he
had an operation to move his big toe to replace his thumb.
He was even pumped about it! "It doesn't look like a toe on a hand -- it looks like a finger on a hand." (You can be your own judge.) Some did think it still looked like a toe, but a little experiment revealed thumbs can indeed look like big toes.
As for the owner of New Jersey's most famous thumb, well, he just wants to remember the dead:
[Doctor] Fuller described Buono as an "inspiration" to other patients who have watched his consistently positive attitude. During Monday's appointment, Fuller said the boy even took time to express sadness over Sept. 11 victims.
As I wrote at the time: "Excuse me, doc, but now's the time in the appointment I'd like to set aside for the victims of the 9/11 attacks. Please join me in a moment of silence and then we can get back to my thumb." Although maybe that should have been "toe."
Another one of the People of the Year is whoever wrote the story's headline: He lost a toe, but gained a thumb.
Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year | The List So Far
Sept. 12: Losing 3 Fingers Does Not Make One Forget 9/11
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December 27, 2006
PWD People Of The Year: Rick Santorum
For many things. But, mainly, for this.
Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year | The List So Far
Archives: Rick Santorum
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December 22, 2006
PWD People Of The Year: Milton Street
Milton Street made a late run at this award, but he did such a great job in those few weeks that he managed to make the logo. He initially
tried to run for State House back in March, but his petition was rejected because he, uh, lives in New Jersey.
Then there was a long silence, until he was indicted for tax fraud and corruption. Street employed a unique strategy of not really answering many questions, just saying things like, "Why don't you come to court and find out?" Eventually, he did answer some questions, but not before he funny photos of him came out.
Oh, yeah, and this. Let's hope Milton testifies in his own defense.
Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year | The List So Far
Archives Milton Street
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December 21, 2006
PWD People Of The Year: Puppies
That's it for me today. I can't top this.
Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year | The List So Far
Sleeping Doggy x4 by Yukari* [Flickr, licensed via Creative Commons]
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December 20, 2006
PWD People Of The Year: Curt Weldon
Coming into this year, Curt Weldon was a congressman with almost 20 years of service in the House. Exiting this year, Curt Weldon is a lame duck congressman with almost 20 years of service in the House, but none of them funnier than this one.
How was this year so funny? Well, let's recap: Since 9/11, Curt Weldon had been hawking his theory that the U.S. government blew it. Which is true, obviously, but Weldon's theory involved secret sources that talked only to him, in addition to a secret program called "Able Danger." When his theory began to unravel in the early months of this year, Weldon decided to drop another bombshell: Osama Bin Laden is dead in Iran.
Despite this rumormongering, Weldon was still seen as a shoo-in for election. But then in April, he criticized his opponent, Joe Sestak, for the hospital choice he made for his daughter who had a brain tumor.
As election day neared, old stories resurfaced -- his attendance at a coronation of Rev. Moon as the world's savior, the time he went to Libya and to meet Muammar al-Gaddafi, how he somehow combined the two incidents, etc. -- but Weldon began to refute any charges against him with nonsense words.
Then, FBI agents raided several homes/offices of his daughter, his daughter's associates and Weldon's political buddy, causing Weldon to respond by telling fellow POTY winner Stephen Morse about all the people against him.
Weldon ended up blaming every single person in the Western World for this raid, and -- despite cheers of "Curt! Curt! Curt!" -- he lost the election to Joe Sestak. He didn't even give a totally awesome concession speech (something Rick Santorum blew, too).
What's next for Curt? Well, currently, he's telling conservative newspapers the CIA is out-of-control and helping Democrats. (With, y'know, the democrat in the executive office and all. Er.) 2006 was a good year for Curt Weldon funny, could he bounce back in 2007? Let's hope so.
Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year | The List So Far
Archives: Curt Weldon
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December 19, 2006
PWD People Of The Year: Barbaro And Fans
Back in May, a semi-local horse named Barbaro
won the Kentucky Derby -- even with
Frankie Avalon rooting against him.
It led to a ridiculous talking Barbaro who couldn't pronounce Preakness on NBC 10's website.
Then, in the Preakness, Barbaro got hurt. The local newspapers let us know this was a tragedy.
But instead of being turned into glue or dog chow or whatever else horses are made into, he survived and got all these get well wishes online.
But then, just when we all thought he was better, it looked like he was going to die again. But then maybe not! And then people -- doctors! -- started saying that if Barbaro survives, humanity will be better off.
And then somebody wrote erotic fan fiction about fucking Barbaro.
Let's not forget Dr. Dean Richardson, Barbaro's doctor. Although he got some hate mail for trying to save an animal -- including at least one that asked, "Well, how come you haven't checked his semen to see if he's fertile?" -- and killed a polar bear he was operating on, he eventually received many accolades. He was even up for Sports Illustrated Sportsman of the Year for saving a llama owned by an SI writer.
And then, in October, the Daily Pennsylvanian published an article about a group of Barbaro fans who pray for him every night. About a woman who canceled her honeymoon so she could stay by the computer for updates on Barbaro. About a woman who won't give her husband dinner unless he asks how Barbaro's doing. And that contained this quote about Barbaro:
"I think he's here for a reason, to bring people together. I think it was God's will to be perfectly honest with you."
And now he's going to survive. And this is going to keep going on.
For all of that, this horse and his fans are one of the Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year. Now I'm going to go run into a brick wall and see if it makes me feel any better.
Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year | The List So Far
Archives: Barbaro
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December 18, 2006
PWD People Of The Year: Teresa Masterson
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pwddmac: so i need to name teresa masterson one of the people of the year
anonymous reader: well duh
reader: i can't believe she's not THE person of the year
pwddmac: she was in the running, believe me.
reader: i should hope so!
pwddmac: the hard part was trying to figure out what to honor her for.
reader: hugging.
reader: it has to be the hugging, doesn't it?
reader: the inappropriate, non-stop hugging?
pwddmac: i was thinking going pole dancing -- and then bashing it! -- led the way, but you might be on to sometehing there.
reader: i'm sure she hugged the pole. heh.
pwddmac: and all her potential suitors on that speed date +1.
pwddmac: man, there was just so much! it's really hard to narrow it down to just a few things.
pwddmac: don't forget this: "But in this Britney Spears culture, where women feel it necessary to show it all, it seems like were missing the good stuff when everyone is showing off all of their stuff."
reader: oh if we're turning this into a "find the best line in her ouevre" contest, it's going to take a while.
reader: oh what about that phil roy dinner party she thought she was covering but ended up working for him?
pwddmac: that was great. and she also whined that she couldn't get into the trenton thunder locker room.
pwddmac: oh, and how about the one where she dieted and later got drunk?
pwddmac: wasn't that supposed to be just a part 1 of many?
reader: oh yeah!
reader: what happened, teresa?
pwddmac: god, we're like two kids discussing simpsons episodes. i dare to bring up steve irwin or paula deen.
pwddmac: or when sharif street tried to pick her up.
reader: where has she gone, anyway?
pwddmac: she's working on digphilly.com! remember her Myspace stalking article?
reader: yeah, but she hasn't been on there in ages
pwddmac: well clearly they're holding her back for the big opening
reader: oh right
reader: they're putting out on feb. 1
pwddmac: yeah, remember, something like: "come feb. 1, we're no tease. we put out."
pwddmac: or: "come feb. 1, we break our hymen."
pwddmac: something like that
reader: ewww
pwddmac: ha, i'm totally keeping that in.
reader: gross
Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year | The List So Far
Archives: Teresa Masterson
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PWD People Of The Year: Bill Henley
The weatherman and 10! co-host wins for this, on Feb. 1, 2006:
"Nice box, Miss America." Truer words were never spoken.
Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year | The List So Far
Archives: Bill Henley
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December 15, 2006
PWD People Of The Year: Stephen Morse
Back before I was even a "hungry young cub" -- description of me courtesy of Phillymag -- I was an editor for two years at the Daily Pennsylvanian, Penn's student paper. And so, I know that every semester the columnists change in a process that's both long and annoying as hell and makes you wonder how anyone ever got into Penn since oh my God, none of these people can write.
But I digress. This means -- and brace yourself for this -- we could be losing Stephen Morse. For the past semester, Morse has been an online columnist on the DP's The Spin. And there's no telling if he'll re-apply or, even if he does, if he'll be selected.
Consider this an impassioned plea to both Morse and the DP editorial board. We cannot lose Stephen Morse. Consider:
Clearly, Stephen Morse was a Person of the Year for 2006. I think he deserves a shot at a repeat nomination.
Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year | The List So Far
Archives: Stephen Morse
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December 14, 2006
PWD People Of The Year: Jim Osman
Jim Osman is not a reporter who we see too often. (And not just because he's on Channel 3.) But one day in August, he gave us
the Citizen Kane of local TV news reports.
As it turns out, court papers -- "confidential court papers!" -- were strewn about Broad Street the morning of August 18. CBS 3 reporter Jim Osman was on the case, reporting as if someone had just dropped an atomic bomb on Center City. He also waved around "confidential court documents" as if they were ... something you wave around a lot.
Osman's entire report was awesome, but it was his kicker that made it People of the Year worthy. Here, watch for yourself.
"We'll keep working all the angles on this story this afternoon to see why, and how these documents ended up on Broad Street. As the saying goes, someone has some 'splainin to do."
Someone did eventually do some 'splainin and, uh, the documents weren't confidential. That makes it even better, really.
Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year | The List So Far
Archives: Jim Osman
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December 13, 2006
PWD People Of The Year: Darren Daulton
We Phillies fans think about the 1993 Phillies a decent amount, since they're the most recent Fightins squad to actually make it to the playoffs. But nothing would have prepared us for Darren Daulton, who this February revealed that
he thinks the world is going to end when the Mayans said it would.
But that's not all! The former Phillies catcher -- who has been arrested "five or six" times and who did eventually win a World Series with the Marlins in 1997 -- calls his theories "metaphysics." He believes (loosely copied from my original post):
- Daulton defines metaphysics as anything beyond the five senses: reincarnation, the fourth and fifth dimensions, out-of-body experiences.
- Dutch says his car accident in Jan. 2001, where he was arrested for drunk driving, was actually someone intentionally running him off the road because of a business deal with ties to the FBI and White House.
- He once got the game-winning hit against the Cubs (while with the Marlins) and, afterward, started crying. He told his wife "I didn't hit that ball. Something happened, but it wasn't me."
- Daulton subscribes (loosely) to the Mayan theory: The world will end on Dec. 12, 2012, at exactly 11:11 GMT. At that time, the chosen will simply vanish from the plane of existence.
- During his last stint in prison, he wrote a 32,000-word manuscript titled If They Only Knew! that's all about his theories.
- Dutch thinks the secrets of the pyramids are strategically placed all around the galaxy (the moon, Mars, and the like.).
- And here's his feeling on rosin bags: "Sure. A rosin bag is just a mirage of innumerable particles constantly speeding up or slowing down. But the Fourth and Fifth Dimensions remain unseen by most people. Their vibrations are at a lower frequency."
Oh, Darren. Why is John Kruk on Baseball Tonight and not you?
Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year | The List So Far
Feb. 17: Daultonian Metaphysics, explained
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December 12, 2006
PWD People Of The Year: Jethro Heiko
Yesterday, protesters of the city's coming casinos ventured to Harrisburg to attempt to execute a "citizen's search warrant" and
14 of them were arrested, of course.
Among those arrested was Jethro Heiko, who Metro published this Carolyn Kaster AP photo of today. And her expression, outfit and "No Dice" -- is that like "No Fear"? -- headgear are more than enough to make her one of the Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year, instantly.
Oh, and yes, there are going to be days where more than one of the People of the Year are revealed. Because, well, come on, if I did one a day I'd be going well into 2007, and that's just no fun.
Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year | The List So Far
Anti-slot activists rebuked, arrested [Metro]
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PWD People Of The Year: John Street
If I wanted to, I could simply name John Street the Philadelphia Will Do Person of the Year every day and I would be totally justified. (Because it's my award. And because he really could win it every day.)
I'm not going to recap John Street and how he became a constant cause of hilarity this year. I don't need to mention when he called Ryan Howard "Ron" for an entire speech, or when he decided to hand over the New Year's Eve fireworks to a company attempting to get a license to open a casino on the Delaware. And those were just in the last 30 days! Not to mention the whole mess with the smoking ban and the whole "will-he-sign-it?" waiting period.
And, of course, his opinion on the Rocky Statue.
But let's just focus on new things, shall we? First off, I just found that photo on top on Flickr. (Thank you, so much, robertsonpennsbornfreeman, whoever you are.) It is the greatest photograph of all time, even better than the other one I also found on Flickr which is at right. (Seriously, robertsonpennsbornfreeman, you are my new favorite Flickr user.)
Then there's what happened yesterday at a special City Council session where members grilled Paul Vallas about dropout rates and the random $73 million deficit the district recently realized it had. The mayor was there as well, and here's how Inquirer writer Kristen A. Graham described it:
As many parents have done, Street called for smaller class sizes and an expansion of after-school programs.
"We should be prepared to go to Harrisburg in the spring to fight for money," Street said. Turning to the packed Council chambers, where audience members held up signs that read "Stop the Bickering" taped with photos of Street and Vallas, he said, "Can I get an amen?"
Some murmured their response.
Amen, brother. Amen.
Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year | The List So Far
Of deficits and dropout rates [Inky]
Archives: John Street
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December 11, 2006
PWD People Of The Year: McMuhammad
To ease our way into the Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year this week, I figured I'd start with an easy one. Muhammad Shaukat, aka McMuhammad,
the newsstand vendor who threatened to rape people. Oh, and the newsstand vendor from India who looked like he was from Galway.
Yes, McMuhammad sold porn front and center outside the Public Ledger building, leading to complaints. Instead of just moving Voluptuous to the back of the newsstand, he put up a note, reading, in part:
"I gone a fuck his mother, sister, wife or her... who complain my newsstand. Come front of me."
This, of course, led to City Council passing a ban on newsstands on that stretch of sidewalk, leaving McMuhammad left to give an impassioned defense of his newsstand to Fox 29.
But, hey, Muhammad, you didn't actually harm any women -- despite what one impassioned poster on Phillyblog said -- and so you were pretty entertaining for that week or so. Lovely.
Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year | The List So Far
Archives: Muhammad Shaukat
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December 08, 2006
PWD People Of The Year: Matt Donegan
Way back early in the year, our collective attention was drawn to the town of Dover, Del., and
The Dover Post. Normally, when my attention is drawn to a small weekly newspaper, it's because of some funny typo or letter to the editor. But, in this case, it was because of Matt Donegan, who
was fired because of what he wrote on his Myspace blog.
Let's take a trip down memory lane and take a look at some of his comments, shall we?
- "Thanks for that one, Doctor [Martin Luther King]. Now, because of you, I feel like I've been backed over by a black pickup truck today. Further, because of your life, it would be considered a racial crime for me (aka 'The Man') to shoot up a house full of black people who don't know how to keep their car stereos, or voices, at a normal tone in a residential area in the middle of a black night.... It's that kind of dick move by black people that turns all other people into racists. I bet James Earl Ray was woken up by black people yelling pointlessly in the streets the night before he killed your civil rights leader."
- "At least I inherited the mighty fallace [sic] gene, and therefore have no need for computer knowledge, or smarts of any kind for that matter."
- "That gym was a god damned zoo. I can't believe most of those animals are allowed out of the house. There was a mini-brawl between a couple of black fans (95% of them were black), some kid said he was going to steal my camera and half of the people there smelled like pot."
- He also cursed out -- uh, in writing? -- a person who had called the paper asking for coverage of handicapped persons' rights.
And, Donegan offered this spirited defense on NBC 10:
"That's preposterous," Donegan said when asked if he was a racist. "If you can't separate that work environment from what I do on my own blog, then you're a moron. Everything written there was meant as a joke, and somebody doesn't take it as a joke, then I'm sorry, but that's your problem, not my problem. If you don't like it, don't read it."
If you're wondering how old this story is, I made a Drew Rosenhaus joke about this quote. Donegan also made some free speech defenses -- but since Delaware doesn't have right-to-work laws and Donegan was hired at will, he was sort of out of luck.
But his story made headlines -- even, somehow, national ones -- back in February, with various people decrying "political correctness" or whatever. The story quickly faded, but not before getting his own horrible Wikipedia entry. No word on Donegan's whereabouts now; his Myspace page is gone; this is presumably him working for The Hometown News in Florida.
Anyway, a reporter fired for blogging? Totally a Philadelphia Will Do Person of the Year. There's really no way I could keep him off this list.
Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year | The List So Far
Archives: Matt Donegan
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December 07, 2006
PWD People Of The Year: Irresistible Ella
My enthusiasm for NBC 10's Irresistible Ella has waned since she ("she") was introduced in May, and it appears the NBC10.com staff has tired of it as well, not updating quite as often as they used to.
But no matter. Ella won all of our hearts upon her debut with her robotic feminine voice and her on-sight reports from Citizens Bank Park, The Late Show With David Letterman, The Spectrum, a boxing ring with Mike Tyson in it and The White House.
Ella also seems to be still suffering from some sort of skin cancer, since she's been sunburned since at least late August.
But, really, Ella makes the list -- as our first, but not last, non-human winner -- simply because NBC 10 bought a license to use that Vhost thing (or whatever) and actually put it up on a news website. And her reports are still mostly culled from wire services.
But, hey, would we expect anything less?
Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year | The List So Far
Irresistible Ella [NBC 10]
Archives: Irresistible Ella
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December 06, 2006
PWD People of the Year: Melvin Fortune And The Anonymous, Awesome Love Park Bubble Pranksters
Very rarely do we get so much in just one short media appearance. Usually it takes at least a month -- or, in Milton Street's case, a
career -- of hilarity to approach the top of the Philadelphia Zeitgeist.
Melvin Fortune is a special case. The Philadelphia maintenance worker said only two sentences to the media all year, and yet those two sentences managed to get him a nod in Philadelphia Will Do's People of the Year. (This most important award of them all!)
After pranksters poured a box of detergent into the Love Park fountain in early September, NBC 10 decided to focus on the bad side of the totally awesome prank, by interviewing a Fairmount Park commissioner who said it'd cost thousands to hose down Love Park and a woman from North Philly who said it was upsetting.
And then NBC 10 talked to maintenance worker Melvin Fortune:
"Keep your bubbles back at home. That's the signal I'm trying to send to you."
No sentence better explains Philadelphia, 2006, than "Keep your bubbles back at home." Thank you, Melvin Fortune. (Who even inspired an anonymous commenter to adopt his persona as an angry conservative, for some reason.) And thank you, pranksters. If you ever want to share the details of your college-style prank that turned totally awesome with the world, you know who to contact.
Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year | The List So Far
Sept. 5: Keep Your Bubbles Back At Home, People
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December 05, 2006
PWD People Of The Year: Michael Untermeyer
Well before any of us even cared about the 2006 election -- seriously, this happened in August -- former Pennsylvania Senior Deputy Attorney General and Ed Rendell campaign aide Michael Untermeyer
announced his candidacy for sheriff for 2007.
In his press release, Untermeyer (or his PR guy, whatevs) said that the "Rocky Statue" would be making an appearance at his campaign kick-off event at Headhouse Square. It was meant to show his dedication to, uh, being the underdog, and winning with a million-to-one shot... although since Rocky lost the first fight... Also, at the time the move of the Rocky Statue to the side of the Art Museum was in the news, so, y'know, a news hook.
However: Note that it is "Rocky Statue" and not Rocky Statue. Because, at the campaign event, Michael Untermeyer posed with... a black dude painted bronze. (Who, apparently, has a part-time job as a host at Cosi.) Of all the people on this planet, Untermeyer found the person who looks least like Rocky.
Some may think that Michael Untermeyer was being a little sneaky or playing a semantics game here, but let's try to look at it another way: He's so busy planning on how to be a better sheriff than the current one that he didn't have time to get the real Rocky Statue or find an Italian guy. He just grabbed the first dude he saw who'd agree to be spraypainted bronze and pretend to box, because, hey, he's a busy man. It's not his fault the person he happened to pick looked absolutely nothing like Rocky. Just bad luck, is all.
Really, c'mon, the current sheriff's website won't load for me. Untermeyer's campaign site does. Plus, as I wrote before: If he is just a big liar, then he'll definitely fit right in. He can probably make a campaign ad out of this whole thing: Michael Untermeyer, endorsed by Cosi® and Black Rocky!
Oh, wait, his campaign page links to Philadelphia Will Do's coverage of him. Seriously, this is a candidate I can get behind. Does Sheriff Green have a link to this blog on his website? Hmm?
Prospects for 2007: Running for sheriff; extra night shifts at Cosi®.
Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year | The List So Far
Archives: Michael Untermeyer
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December 04, 2006
PWD People Of The Year: Rick Mariano
I figured I'd start off with an obvious one. Hey, he's right in the center of the graphic!
Had Rick Mariano done his City Hall breakdown/non-breakdown in 2006, he'd obviously be a shoo-in for the Person of the Year award. Alas, that happened back in October 2005 -- it feels like it was just yesterday! -- and so he's merely one of our many People of the Year.
But that doesn't mean our pal Ricky didn't do anything this year, oh no. Early in the year, Mariano was sued by a former assistant who claimed she was fired for cooperating with authorities. Then his trial started -- and was liveblogged by the Inquirer.
The trial featured profanity -- "If you can't get this fucking shit done, get the fuck out." -- as well as a side-story where Mariano got police officers to protect him from the media. It all culminated in Mariano's March conviction, an apology from the councilman and his sentencing in June to 6½ years in prison.
It seems weird that Mariano got 6½ years. Not to make excuses for him, but all he was really guilty of was not figuring out a way to take bribes "legally" and yet he got pulled away from his family and sent to prison. Honestly, it's a shame. When you can, say, get five years probation for soliciting sex for a minor, well... shit ain't right.
But they say tragedy plus time equals comedy, and perhaps the story of Rick Mariano will one day become a full-blown comedy. Not that it doesn't have any comedy in it to begin with. If tragedy plus time equals comedy, then what does comedy plus time equal? Well, even better comedy. Here it is, your Rick Mariano Moment of the Year, Gategate:
Ain't never gonna get old.
Update: More Gategate goodness.
Prospects for 2007: Uh, in jail.
Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year
Archives: Rick Mariano
Posted by D-Mac at 04:05 PM
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Philadelphia Will Do People Of The Year
It's the fourth of December, and therefore it's time to shamelessly recycle content into year-end packages. Recycling content has been a staple of media since Moses presented his "Top 3 Commandments" a few months after getting the original 10.
And, as such, since 2006 is the first full year I'll be doing Philadelphia Will Do -- yikes -- it's time to recycle some content of my own. Introducing, then: The Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year. They are the Philadelphia-area people who somehow entertained, amused or depressed us at various times of the year. Each weekday the rest of the month, I'll be presenting a PotY, culminating in the unveiling of Philadelphia Will Do's Person of the Year on December 29.
I, obviously, already have tons of people to choose from, but I'm willing to take some help, too. If you'd like to nominate someone for the award -- feel free to nominate those above, but I tried to only put 100 percent locks in the graphic -- you can email me at dmac@philadelphiawilldo.com or get me on IM at pwddmac.
The only qualifications? Well, it has to be somebody who was in and around the Philadelphia news during the year, and it has to be someone I've written about at least once. (Sadly, that means Daily News reporter Simone Weichselbaum is not eligible for a PotY Award for this blog post.) That's about it. It doesn't have to necessarily be a person and it can be a group of people. As for what kind of person will be getting this award, think more Terrell Owens than Ryan Howard.
After the jump, a running tally of the Philadelphia Will Do People of the Year.
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Posted by D-Mac at 02:42 PM
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