February 14, 2008

Patrick Murphy Is A True Eagles Fan

See? Now this is how you do it. While Arlen Specter is wasting his time meeting with the NFL commissioner, freshman U.S. Rep. Patrick Murphy is putting his Eagles fandom into law.

On Wednesday, the House passed a resolution congratulating the New York Giants on winning this year’s Super Bowl “and completing one of the most remarkable postseason runs in professional sports history.” The resolution passed by a vote of 412 to 1.

Murphy, a diehard Eagles fan who worked at Veterans Stadium as a security guard when he was 16, was the only House member to vote against it. “As a former 700-level security guard and lifelong Eagles fan, I couldn’t, in good conscience, vote for the New York Giants,” Murphy said Thursday. “The only thing worse would have been a resolution honoring the Dallas Cowboys.”

Patrick Murphy is not only a great Philadelphian, he is the greatest U.S. representative of all time.

Murphy won't cheer Giants [Bucks County Courier via Philly EDGE]

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April 13, 2007

Beating, Thanking A Dead Horse

Oh, just when you thought the news was all Don Imus and Jon Corzine comes the news about two new important bills pending on Capitol Hill. Our Congresspeople have gotten together to propose two Barbaro-related bills.

Well, the first bill doesn't mention Barbaro at all, but it is a ban on eating horses. (Well, it's the actual clever workaround of banning eating horses by banning the transportation of horses for slaughter. Same thing.) And, of course, we would never know about this bill at all if not for Barbaro.

Now, I have absolutely no interest ever in eating a horse. First off, I bet they taste like shit. And anybody who wants to eat a non-Barbaro horse is a little off in my book. But I believe every American should have the God-given right to eat whatever animal they want, even bald eagles. (Especially bald eagles! What better way to celebrate freedom than by eating it!)

Continue reading "Beating, Thanking A Dead Horse"

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April 06, 2007

New War To Be Just As Successful As Current Wars

While it appears we won't be seeing World War III start today, it's still been a while since we've started a war, and consarnit, it's time for another one!

Iraq War vet and U.S. Congressman Patrick Murphy explains:

With several local officials standing at his side, Congressman Patrick Murphy revealed Thursday the beginning of Bucks County’s "war against flooding."

Judging from how well our wars in Iraq and Afghanistan and on drugs are going, I expect Bucks County to be fully under water by 2009.

Murphy ready to tackle flooding [Bucks County Courier Times]
Tuesday: Bunch: You're All Gonna Die In A Pointless War!

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March 06, 2007

Patrick Murphy Fitting In With Politicians Just Fine

As the U.S. Congress' only newcomer who served in the current Iraq war, Patrick Murphy's opinions on the current conflict -- as well as the troop escalation plan -- carry extra weight. (I guess. I 'unno.)

But, as you can see, the Iraq vet is fitting in right well with the politicians, as he recently did a nice job of making an out-of-date reference, a politician's best friend:

"They are getting frustrated. They feel like it's (the Bill Murray movie) 'Groundhog Day' now, four years later, that the Iraqis continue not to stand up, no matter what we do."

If only the Iraqi army had seen Groundhog Day. Then they'd slap their foreheads and would know what the soldiers were talking about. "Oh! 'Groundhog Day!' They're getting tired, we gotta stand up for ourselves!"

Bucks County Congressman Says Iraq Must Step Up Now [KYW 1060]
Previous Highlights In Outdated References From Politicians
Feb. 13: York Co. Dem.: Idea Not Fucktastic, But Important
Dec. 21, 2006: Dem. State House Leader Uses Inspiring Rhetoric From Confederate General Also Famous For Killing Mexican Civilians

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January 26, 2007

Bob Brady Is Tough On The Issues

The issues being "improperly worn suit coats," which Brady is rectifying here by fixing U.S. Rep. Patrick Murphy's blazer.

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December 11, 2006

Leftovers: Donté For Silly Walk Minister!

• Be sure to check out the Inquirer's Eagles photo gallery, which includes some nice shots -- including this photo of Donté Stallworth auditioning for the position of Minister of the Silly Walks after he scored yesterday. [Inky]

• Hot damn! Fourteen casino protesters showed they were worth their salt by going up and being arrested today in Harrisburg. Making it even better, they were attempting to execute "a citizen's search warrant" on the Gaming Commission, asking for casino planning documents. Hurrah, hurrah, protesters, without you life wouldn't be quite as fun. [Inquirer]

• Strikes, the bowling alley in West Philly, was robbed this morning of over $12,000 at around 10 a.m., after a man tied up three employees and took four overnight deposit bags. Police are happy, though, because had he picked up a few spares he would have gotten away with a lot more. [AP/CBS 3]

• Patrick Murphy in new documentary: "So listen up, don’t take no sedative, my name’s Murph and I’m running for representative." I love him even more now, I think. [Bucks County Courier Times]

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November 13, 2006

This Is Your Future, Patrick Murphy

Now that Patrick Murphy is the Congressman-elect in the 8th District, he's busy getting ready to face all the local issues in notoriously finicky Buxco. (I guess it's notoriously finicky. If it wasn't before, it is now.)

One of those issues is a veterans cemetary in Upper Makefield, which the Bucks County Courier Times reported cost Fitzpatrick some votes in the township. the story is way too complex and annoying for me to follow, but I do agree that Murphy will have to face this issue head on. But he should hold it near and dear to his heart, the Courier reports:

On Thursday, Murphy said he's “looking forward to moving the ball even further [on the cemetery issue]” once he takes office in January. The matter is, after all, close to the Iraq war veteran's heart, since he and his wife Jenni, could be buried in the cemetery.

Just think about it, Pat! Your dead body could decompose and rot in the ground right in Upper Makefield! Enjoy this issue during the first few months of your time in office!

How will 8th change affect vets cemetery? [Bucks County Courier Times]

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November 08, 2006

Did Mike Fitpatrick's Own Party Do Him In?

Let's take you back to April 2000. Yes, that's a ways back, but remember: People threw money at Internet businesses without even asking how they would make money, Arlen Specter was a U.S. Senator from Pennsylvania and John Street was bumbling around as mayor of Philadelphia. Okay, maybe things weren't all that different, but April 1, 2000 was when the census was taken.

Said census reduced Pennsylvania's representatives to 19 (down two) and the Republican legislature went around to re-drawing districts. And, naturally, the districts were drawn so the Republicans could pick up some seats. Democratic voters filed a lawsuit; the U.S. Supreme Court ruled in favor of the legislature.

The biggest strangely-drawn district is District 6, which the plaintiffs said “looms like a dragon descending on Philadelphia from the west, splitting up towns and communities throughout Montgomery and Berks Counties." But District 8 was interesting, too: It encompassed all of Bucks County, but also snaked over into two wards in Philadelphia and a few sections of Montgomery County.

Fast forward to yesterday, when Mike Fitzpatrick is running for re-election in the 8th District. Of course, this is how the results ended up (please note: mathematical errors committed by me):

Bucks County:	Fitzpatrick +1,036
Montgomery County:	Murphy +1,564
Philadelphia:	Murphy +993
Total:	Murphy +1,521

Had the district just been Bucks County, it appears Fitzpatrick would have made his mom even prouder and won the race. But in part due to the state GOP's redistricting plan... it appears he'll be headed home after just one term. (PA-08 did have to add population from somewhere -- see comments -- to keep the districts equal, so whoever was added to Buxco's district could have swung the election anyway.)

Some would say this is just desserts for the GOP. (Although, really, it's not Fitzpatrick's fault; he was a Chair of the Buxco Board of Commissioners -- a good one! -- at the time.) It is good to see that the state legislature does as good of a job at gerrymandering than it does at passing non-pay raise laws. Thanks, guys.

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November 07, 2006

Now THIS Is A Close Race

Seriously. Sudden death overtime for this one.

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Patrick Murphy's Mom Remains Silent On Issues

One of my favorite campaign mailers this fall was addressed to my mom and I. Apparently, one of my old schools gave my (and my mom's) information to Mike Fitzpatrick's camp, who in turn gave it over to his mother.

Yes, my mom and I -- not, strangely, my dad, who (unlike me) still lives there -- got a letter from Mary Fitzpatrick telling us what a good Catholic boy he was, how he went to Egan and how he loooooooves unborn babies. Okay, Mary doesn't tell us that, but it's certainly the real theme of the letter. Yes, Mike Fitzpatrick and Patrick Murphy are both Catholic, but Murphy is pro-choice. Mary even includes a photocopied column from the Bucks County Courier Times telling us how bad a Catholic Patrick Murphy allegedly is.

Here's the kicker:

[Michael] has been there for me throughout my entire life. I am writing this letter to let him and everyone know I am there for him.

Awwwww. However, I think if I were running for U.S. Congress, my mom would write a nice attack letter herself and not just include a photocopied column from a newspaper attacking my opponent.

Full letter from Ms. Fitz after the jump.

Continue reading "Patrick Murphy's Mom Remains Silent On Issues"

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November 06, 2006

Adwatch: Patrick Murphy & Giant TV Screens

With the election tomorrow, there is only one more day to make fun of stupid political ads. The upshot is that there's only one more day to watch them on television, a point I need to remind myself of every five minutes lest I think this is how things are going to be for the rest of the month.

Another upshot is that I have a lot of pre-packaged content this afternoon, leaving me able to nap under my desk while no one is looking. After the jump, the first of several Adwatches today, this one a look at a recent ad for Democratic House candidate Patrick Murphy, an Iraq war vet.

Continue reading "Adwatch: Patrick Murphy & Giant TV Screens"

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October 30, 2006

Adwatch: Bucks County Kitchens

Today, Adwatch looks at Mike Fitzpatrick, Republican congressman for the Eighth Congressional District, and his recent attack ads toward his opponent.

The ads mostly just replay a clip of Patrick Murphy on Hardball, where he can't tell Chris Matthews whether he would have voted for the Iraq war (which he served in), and they play up his inexperience. Let's explore one of these attack ads, after the jump.

Continue reading "Adwatch: Bucks County Kitchens"

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May 23, 2006

Bah! Who Cares About So-Called 'Rights'! This Is An Election!

We've been covering the anti-Myspace bill introduced by UPS man and U.S. Rep. Mike Fitzpatrick, for a while now, and it's time to give someone else the floor.

First, a bit of background: Fitzpatrick's bill, officially the (yuk yuk) Deleting Online Predators Act -- DOPA, I presume? -- would force schools and libraries to block children from viewing social networking sites, such as Myspace, Facebook, Friendster, etc. It's unclear if this would block social networking sites that are more about, say, photo sharing, like Flickr.

Anyway, obviously this bill is trying to stop children from being the victim of old dirty men trolling for them online, or something, and that's fine. Naturally, of course, it does nothing really to stop the problem of child predators, but it makes for nice election year press, doesn't it?

Some of that nice election year press comes, conveniently, from Bucks County Courier Times columnist J.D. Mullane, who wrote about the issue today, specifically Fitzpatrick's Democratic opponent, Patrick Murphy, who blasted the bill:

I told Murphy it was a blunder to talk about “constitutional rights” when the issue is protecting children from pervs.

It's OK to be high-minded on all that “rights” jazz when you're trolling for votes during primary season. But when the general election season begins, as it has, it's best to respect the family-oriented sensibilities of the suburban heartland, which defines most of Bucks County, but especially defines where I live, Levittown.

In my house, children have no “constitutional rights.” I am the law, judge and jury. My word is final. Three weeks ago, I was at the top of my game in this role during an incident that involved, coincidently, MySpace.com.

With Mullane on the case, no predator is safe! And neither are your rights!

A blunder in race for Congress [Bucks County Courier Times]
May 19: Rhetoric On Anti-Myspace Bill Reaches New Levels

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May 19, 2006

Rhetoric On Anti-Myspace Bill Reaches New Levels

Okay, Mike Fitzpatrick. (That's him, at right, helping UPS deliver some packages. No, really.) You almost had us fooled. You were a Republican congressman who seemed pretty levelheaded, without any sort of wild extreme right-wing positions. And you seemed pretty on the ball. But of course, now, you have to go and try to block access to Myspace -- and other social networking sites -- from being accessed in schools or libraries.

(The bill actually blocks access for people under 18, but the thinking is that schools and libraries will just block it. Schools are mostly under-18 anyway, and almost all libraries don't have room for a separate over-18 section.)

The Democratic candidate for house, Patrick Murphy, has rightly denounced the legislation as re-effing-diculous, and an overreaction that would do nothing to solve the problem of child predators online:

“You don't protect children by infringing on people's constitutional rights,” Murphy said Thursday. “It's shortsighted and wrong. It's a political ploy from a typical politician.”

A ploy? Indeed. It's a typical election year ploy: Fitzpatrick gets to introduces this bill; he happens to be coincidentally up against a war vet would could prove to be somewhat popular one, too. (He's a good guy, it seems, so he won't attack his service record.) And so, when Murphy denounces the legislation, Ol' Fitzy can paint him as a lover of child molesters:

“Pat seems more interested in the constitutional rights of online predators than he is about protecting young children,” Fitzpatrick said. “He ought to be ashamed for opposing it.”

Using the newly created Mike Fitzpatrick Overstatement Machine™, we'd like to translate our response -- "this bill is more of a political ploy to win votes than something that will protect children; also, guess who doesn't have computers at home: the poor" -- into a Mike Fitzpatrick overstatement:

"Mike Fitzpatrick ought to be ashamed at creating this bill that's just a ploy for him to win votes come November. He seems more interested in staying in office than helping his constitutients. Also, he's introducing the worst bill since the Smoot-Hawley Tariff and he hates the Constitution."

Look for more from the Mike Fitzpatrick Overstatement Generator™ any day now!

Heated exchange follows Fitzpatrick's Myspace bill [Bucks County Courier Times]
Mike Fitzpatrick - Photos [House.gov]
Monday: U.S. Rep. Has No Friends On Myspace

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May 16, 2006

The Shortest -- And Therefore Best -- Political Press Release Ever

In Bucks County, two Democrats are running for the right to face Mike Fitzpatrick, who seemed like a pretty good, head-on-his-shoulders legislator until he introduced an anti-Myspace-in-schools-and-libraries bill!

And so, one of these two guys -- Andrew Warren and Patrick Murphy -- must take down Fitzpatrick in the 8th district in the general election. I'd like to follow the good boys over at Wonkette and endorse Patrick Murphy, simply because of this press release:

LARRY OTTER ENDORSES ANDY WARREN FOR CONGRESS

LEVITTOWN, PA—May 14, 2006—In response to Larry Otter’s endorsement of Andy Warren, Josh Nanberg, campaign manager for Patrick Murphy issued the following statement:

“OK”

In addition to that, his campaign headquarters are in Levittown and his post-election party is at Georgine's in that same wonderful Bill Levitt-designed town.

Official Wonkette Endorsement: Patrick Murphy [Wonkette]
Yesterday: U.S. Rep Has No Friends On Myspace

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February 13, 2006

Blogicized: Winter be gone

• Ahh, yes: Let the pseudo-spring temperatures return! It was nice to see you, Old Man Winter, but don't stick around for too too long. [Philadelphia Weather]

• The Phillies don't have a front line pitcher this season. Please note: The preceding sentence could have been written pretty much in any year. [Beerleaguer]

• Patrick Murphy, running for Congress in Pennsylvania's eighth district, once penned a column for a college newspaper. Of course, it was when he was a professor at West Point, so it's not the typical "Cafeteria food sure does suck!" fare. [Above Average Jane]

• Reasons not to watch figure skating coverage this year: 1. There's nobody you know. 2. One competitor didn't put a hit out on another competitor this year. 3. The rule barring female skaters from wearing pants was recently lifted. [Pesky'Apostrophe]

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January 30, 2006

Quickies: Temple of the dog and cat

• While I'm not as big of a fan of them as I am of puppies, kittens are pretty boffo too. But sometimes they can be used for evil. Or at least to reinforce gender stereotyping, or something. Readers are angry at Step Inside Design's December/January issue, which had a kitten-filled cover to represent the "Women of Design." The response: "But we honestly believe you can change connotations by re-appropriating them (especially with humor). That's why it's OK for Spike Lee to make a movie about minstrel shows but it would not be OK if Woody Allen did. Mel Brooks can get away for Springtime for Hitler, but Prussian Blue can't ... context is everything." This is what as known as the "re-appropriating stereotypes cop out." [Folio Magazine]

• In honor of the Chinese New Year -- the year of the dog -- here's a list of the top 100 pop culture dogs ever. Krypto, Superman's dog, lands at #19. I'm feverishly working on a Top 100 Puppies Ever list. [Retrocrush]

• Somebody at the BBC totally effed up and somehow the BBC spent some time filming in Bristol, Bucks County, as opposed to the version of that town across the pond. (Okay, they're actually following around Iraq War vet and Democrat Patrick Murphy -- who's also running for Congress -- which means give the liberal bloggers five minutes to start going nutso over this television appearance.) [Bucks County Courier Times]

• I want to live in this guy's world, because I bet the mind-altering drugs are fantastic: "[The Washington Post has] decided to use their pages to mount a political campaign against progressive bloggers, who they've apparently decided are their sworn enemy. It's absolutely paranoid and ridiculous." [MyDD]

• Yes, if you've stepped outside today, Philadelphia is channeling 1849 London with all this fog. [Philadelphia Weather]

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