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November 15, 2007

Darren Daulton's Book Is Out!

111507daulton.jpg
As you may know, former Phillies catcher Darren Daulton believes the world is going to end in 2012. He also says rosin bags are some sort of dimensional gateway, I think: "Sure. A rosin bag is just a mirage of innumerable particles constantly speeding up or slowing down. But the Fourth and Fifth Dimensions remain unseen by most people. Their vibrations are at a lower frequency."

Well, Daulton has finally released his book, If Only They Knew, which is not a memoir of his baseball career but a treatise on Daultonian metaphysics.

With If They Only Knew, Darren joins a growing list of prominent authors discussing the subjects of the metaphysical. It has been prompted by an increased awareness and interest in the spiritual aspects of our being and our place in the world.

In If They Only Knew Darren talks about issues of ascension such as dimensions and levels of consciousness, the prophesy of the Mayan Calendar and December 21, 2012, looking within our selves to create our own reality, the energies of awakening and a lot more.

A review on Amazon says Daulton feels he has been "chosen... to awaken us." Oh, I'm sorry, you're not reading this anymore, since you've already rushed to the website to purchase the book. My copy is on its way!

If Only They Knew [Amazon]
If Only They Knew [DarrenDaulton.com]

Posted by D-Mac at 09:00 AM | Comments (6) | TrackBack (0)

March 07, 2006

Leftovers: Puppies 'n' such

030706puppy.jpg • Darren Daulton doesn't care if you think he's off his rocker. When his book comes out, you'll convert to Daultonian Metaphysics. [Inky]

• Slate's Seth Stevenson gives those creepy effing VW ads with the evil robot thing in the car an A-. Next, he's going to give the puppy at left (via Flickr) an A+ times (infinity + 1), since clearly his grading system is inflated. [Slate]

• Barry Bonds did steroids! Wait. His head got as big as a novelty oversized beach ball. Didn't everyone already know he was on the juice? [SI.com]

• Now that we've cut Iraq's murder rate down to 0, ended the drug war, solved the problem of AIDS, it's time for the flag burning amendment. Because, you know, these are the things that are important. [Wonkette]

• The guy who invented Hotmail -- with a partner, and it was called HoTMaiL back then -- is back to rethink blogging. Or, as he calls it, BLoGGiNG. [Financial Times via digg]

• Don't extinguist those cigs just yet, New Jerseyans: A federal lawsuit has been filed against the ban. [AP/Camden Courier-Post]

Posted by D-Mac at 04:51 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

February 17, 2006

Daultonian Metaphysics, explained

021706darrendaulton.jpg Darren Daulton is awesome. That's all I can say about it. He's awesome. He's my new favorite ex-Phillie. He might be the greatest player of all time. No, the greatest person of all time.

Since he retired after winning a World Series with the Marlins in 1997, Darren Daulton hasn't quite enjoyed the success of his 1993 Phillies peers. John Kruk is on ESPN. Lenny Dykstra owns a chain of car washes. Wes Chamberlain has a lucrative career with his organic soybean farm. (Okay, I made that last one up.) But Darren Daulton has been arrested "five or six" times, has reportedly had money woes (he denies this), &c. &c.

But now, all is okay, because -- as reported on SI.com and in the Daily News -- Darren Daulton is now into metaphysics. What does that mean, exactly? Let's do this in charticle form:

  • Daulton defines metaphysics as anything beyond the five senses: reincarnation, the fourth and fifth dimensions, out-of-body experiences. He doesn't say time travel, but we all have to assume that's included, too.
  • Dutch says his car accident in Jan. 2001, where he was arrested for drunk driving, was actually someone intentionally running him off the road because of a business deal with ties to the FBI and White House.
  • He once got the game-winning hit against the Cubs (while with the Marlins in this final season) and, afterward, started crying. He told his wife "I didn't hit that ball. Something happened, but it wasn't me."
  • Daulton subscribes (loosely) to the Mayan theory: The world will end on Dec. 12, 2012, at exactly 11:11 GMT. At that time, the chosen will simply vanish from the plane of existence.
  • During his last stint in prison, he wrote a 32,000-word manuscript titled If They Only Knew! that's all about his theories.
  • Dutch thinks the secrets of the pyramids are strategically placed all around the galaxy (the moon, Mars, &c.).
  • And here's his feeling on rosin bags: "Sure. A rosin bag is just a mirage of innumerable particles constantly speeding up or slowing down. But the Fourth and Fifth Dimensions remain unseen by most people. Their vibrations are at a lower frequency."

Darren Daulton, everyone! I can't wait to buy his book. Someone find this man a publisher.

Beam us up, Dutchie [SI.com]
Daulton caught off base [DN]

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