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June 17, 2008Arlen Would Take A Medical Toke
Gross reports in an ever-so-detailed fashion that when he asked if he would puff even if it were illegal, Specter smiled and said he was "certainly not about to say I would violate the law." But he'd be okay with breaking federal medical marijuana law if it were legal in Pennsylvania? That's our Arlen! Specter would puff if medical marijuana were legal in Pennsylvania [Phillygossip] Posted by D-Mac at 12:50 PM | Comments (1) May 15, 2008Sen. Specter Has Priorities In Order
The NFL says, "Oh, this scandal is all over, sorry everybody." But Arlen Specter isn't having any of that! Yes, the man who should be investigating any one of the number of United States atrocities in the name of the wars on Iraq or terror or drugs is content to investigate the New England Patriots. "They are enormous role models for everybody," Specter said. "If you can cheat in the NFL, you can cheat in college, you can cheat in high school, you can cheat on your grade-school math test. There's no limit as to what you can do. I think they owe the public a lot more candor and a lot more credibility." Cue your own favorite stolen 2000 election joke up, people! Anyway, Congress will probably do a hearing or a Mitchell Report-type investigation while President Bush continues to videotape other team's playcalling signals unabated. Sen. Specter wants independent investigation into Spygate [AP/Philly.com] Posted by D-Mac at 10:44 AM | Comments (12) May 08, 2008Specter Asks Us To Be Nice To Ry-Ho
Cheer Ryan Howard On Monday, I suggested on Angelo Cataldi's WIP radio talk show that Philadelphia fans should give Ryan Howard a standing ovation every time he comes to the plate. Those cheers would tell Howard that we understand the struggle, that we are with him, and that he still is the same hero in our eyes who won MVP and Rookie of the Year in successive seasons. Yes, apparently ol' Arlen is following in the footsteps of Post Game Live panelist/Pennsylvania governor Ed Rendell and weighing in on the sports topics of the day. He's actually involved in all the facets of sports: Spygate, the NFL Network and Comcast, Ryan Howard's feelings. Aww, let's all be nice to Ry-Ho so he hits some dingers. Letters to the Editor [Inquirer] Posted by D-Mac at 09:52 AM | Comments (1) February 14, 2008Arlen Specter Continues To Annoy
Specter met with the NFL commish and said he wasn't satisfied with the results of his discussion; he's already planning on holding hearings about the destruction of the Patriots' tapes of other teams. He's even thinking of getting rid of the NFL's antitrust exemption! In the clip attached to this post, The Daily Show's Jon Stewart discusses how Arlen Specter is an absolutely worthless senator. Oh, Arlen [The Daily Examiner] Posted by D-Mac at 02:16 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0) February 05, 2008Larry Kane Is Serious About NFL Results
Specter says he's tried to call, but maybe Goodell gave him a wrong number or something. The NFL sez Goodell will meet with Specter in sunny Hawaii, during the Pro Bowl, perhaps? Fortunately, Specter says all of this could lead to Congressional hearings, which is just a-okay with Television Legend Larry Kane who writes on his magical blog that Specter is right and people attacking him are incorrect. He also begins a paragraph like this: Also, sports fans. Anyway, if you head over to Larry Kane's blog, try to be nice and coherent. Inane comments may fly on the blog of a 12-year-old like myself, but Kane is having a little problem with Hitler comments. No, really: After the football game, I checked my email and was shocked to find some notes that had come through this website. They were from people who listened to my rather tame conversation on the radio earlier in the day. The language was so foul and hateful, it surprised even me, a veteran of 50 years in newsrooms. The reference to my religion were disgusting. Welcome to the Internet, Larry! That's all it is: Anti-semites, racists and porn. Ain't technology grand? Posted by D-Mac at 01:48 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0) February 04, 2008Comcast, Senator Team Up To Screw You
As you may have read earlier, Specter wants to investigate the NFL for Spygate because he just loves fair sports so much and there hasn't been much else going on in Washington. Ha ha, that's just what ol' Arlen said, though, and I hope you knew it wasn't true since a politician said it. Bunch writes that two of Specter's biggest donors are Comcast and lobbying firm Blank Rome, who lobbies for Comcast. Comcast, as you know, is in a war with the NFL over the NFL Network. (Isn't it cute when multi-million dollar corporations fight?) This is probably why Arlen Specter is angry about the NFL's exclusive deal with DirecTV, yet silent on Comcast SportsNet's refusal to sell the channel to satellite systems. Basically, all it means is a politician is screwing you over. But you already knew that. Arlen's tangled Comcastic mess: It's worse than you think [Attytood] Posted by D-Mac at 04:10 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0) Eagles To Retroactively Win Super Bowl 39
Hey, that's the team I root for, too! Alright, Arlen Specter. If no team is going to win on the field, then we're going to make the NFL recordbook look like that year in the Public League where FLC won on the buzzer-beater but were stripped off it later. (Or something like that.) Specter said he would call NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell just hours after the game, which means he could be on the phone with him now. Arlen Specter will hopefully eventually call for hearings as hilarious as the baseball hearings, where the players all said they never did steroids and it turns out, whoops!, they all did steroids. "If they were filming the walk-though in 2002 and they were stealing the signals in 2007, what happened in 2005 with the Eagles?" Specter told 610 WIP's Angelo Cataldi. Yes, really. Were Eagles cheated? Specter asking NFL [Philly.com] Posted by D-Mac at 11:35 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0) November 14, 2007Specter Spends Nearly $1 Mil To Harm Children
Whoops! It turns out Arlen Specter has an earmark in a recently vetoed spending bill that spends nearly a million dollars to hurt Pennsylvania children! Senator Arlen Specter, Republican of Pennsylvania, secured 25 earmarks providing $882,000 for abstinence education programs around the state. He's seen indicators it does work. I can only assume that means he's traveled the commonwealth checking teenage girls to see if their hymens are still intact. Icky. One Lawmaker’s Waste Is Another’s Namesake [NY Times] Posted by D-Mac at 10:27 AM | Comments (27) | TrackBack (0) October 18, 2007Old Senator Makes Fun Of Old Ex-Senator
Ha ha, have you seen the Arlen Specter stand-up routine video on the Inquirer's website? In it, Specter makes a lot of jokes regarding Bob Dole's age. And then he makes some Viagara jokes! Ho ho! He also made a joke about Dan Quayle thinking the word "harass" was two words. Specter made a few good jokes, especially this one about the death of JFK. (What, too soon?) Specter said JFK was killed by only one bullet, which was fired from the Texas School Book Depository. Specter said the bullet traversed 15 layers of clothing, 7 layers of skin and 15 inches of tissue! It went through the back of JFK's next, exiting at the front of his throat, hit Texas Gov. John Connally's back, slid along his fifth rib and exited his chest below the right nipple. It then struck his right wrist, exited at his palm and struck his left thigh, hitting the femur. Somehow, later, it exited Gov. Connally and rested on his stretcher. Now that's a funny joke. Senator Arlen Specter at the DC Improv [Inquirer] Posted by D-Mac at 11:52 AM | Comments (5) | TrackBack (0) October 02, 2007Taubenberger Picks Up Irrelevant Endorsement
However, Specter does show just how good he is at politics with this quote: "I've been trying to bring back a second major party to Philadelphia for forty years," Mr. Specter said. And what a good job, uh, Mr. Specter has done. Specter Endorses Taubenberger For Mayor [The Bulletin] Posted by D-Mac at 10:39 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack (0) September 10, 2007Arlen Specter: I Support Larry Craig, Noted Moron
Specter was upset with the Republican leadership's immediate turn on Craig after news of his arrest on solicitation of sex in an airport bathroom came out (har) last month. Specter called Craig and urged him to withdraw his guilty plea, since he didn't really do anything -- to be honest, I am confused as to what crime Larry Craig actually committed -- and said he should stay in the Senate because it has a minimum number of self-hating gays needed to form a quorum. (It's in the bylaws; look it up.) Actually, naw, he just enjoys the comedy as much as we do. "He thought that this matter would not be publicly disclosed, and that was very foolish," Specter said. "Now look here, you have 27 years in the Congress, you have his reputation, you have his whole life on the line. I think he's entitled to his day in court. Maybe he will be convicted, but I doubt it." You see! He even just called him a dumbass. This country is great. Attorney: Stress from investigation made Craig plead guilty [CNN] Posted by D-Mac at 11:52 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0) September 05, 2007Arlen Specter: Comedy Genius
The toilet senator planned on stepping down on Sept. 30, but now he's thinking of withdrawing his guilty plea and fighting an ethics investigation in the Senate. (This is a tremendous boon for the boys at Wonkette, and for those of us who enjoy humorous writing as well.) Craig said everything turned because of a call from our own magic bullet theorist himself! A telephone call Craig received last week from Sen. Arlen Specter, R-Pa., urging him to consider fighting the guilty plea - and for his seat - affected Craig's decision to reconsider his resignation, Smith said. On Tuesday, Specter, senior Republican on the Senate Judiciary Committee, suggested Craig's GOP colleagues who pressured him last week to resign should re-examine the facts surrounding his arrest. There are a few options here, each one as good as the next. (1) Arlen Specter has been in the Senate too long1 and no longer understands anything. (2) Specter also cruises for gay sex in public restrooms. (3) Specter is a pod person from Mars. (Personally, I think this one is true.) (4) Specter enjoys hilarity as much as I do, and just wants to see where this thing goes next. Whatever the reason, more Larry Craig, Toilet Senator, sounds good to me. Thanks, Arlen! 1 My AP U.S. History teacher complained about Arlen Specter being in the Senate too long. In 1998. Craig Reconsiders Decision to Resign [AP/KYW 1060] Posted by D-Mac at 10:26 AM | Comments (7) | TrackBack (0) December 08, 2006Arlen Specter Gives Sloppy Kiss To David Cohen
Instead, Specter decided to bash the NFL instead, for selling its "Sunday Ticket" package only to DirecTV, threatening to get rid of the NFL's antitrust exemption -- which would allow teams to negotiate their own TV deals, among other things. Yeah, what I really want is the "Eagles Television Network" -- which does a God-awful job on preseason games -- doing the regular season, too. Specter also cited the move of the Baltimore Colts to Indianapolis, which happened in 1982. (Glad you got on that one right away, Mr. Senator.) Of course, while proposing legislation that would strip the NFL of its antitrust exemption, Specter said he would "consider" legislation that would force Comcast to sell their sports networks to satellite TV companies. The problem here is, of course, both companies. The NFL received its antitrust exemption with the assumption the games would be free for all to watch and Comcast shouldn't be able to have a monopoly on its sports programming. But with politicians in charge of fixing it, well... don't expect anything to happen anytime soon. Specter says NFL abuses cable viewers [Inquirer] Posted by D-Mac at 12:46 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0) November 22, 2006Rick Santorum Continues To Ignore Constituents
-------- Original Message -------- If you act fast, you too can have this very own email from "Rick Santorum" delivered to your inbox. Simply contact Rick at SenatorSantorum@santorum.senate.gov and ask him for something! Posted by D-Mac at 01:32 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0) October 23, 2006Swing... And A Miss
Fun story: While I was in college, we accidentally spelled his name wrong in a headline. Whoops. State senator hosts campus forum [Temple News] Posted by D-Mac at 03:15 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0) May 22, 2006Proving, Once Again, That Americans Want Our Politicians To Tackle The Tough Issues
Santorum And Specter Campaign Against College Campus Crime [The Evening Bulletin] Posted by D-Mac at 02:38 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0) May 19, 2006Leftovers: Shore enough
• Speaking of going down the shore, Atlantic City will be remembered in the new Monopoly -- on a Community Chest card. Gee, thanks, Hasbro. [KYW 1060] • Not only is 911 a joke, but so is the CIA. Now, how long until the first "Hey, by reporting this you're hurting national security!" from Michelle Malkin? [Harpers] • A delivery company screwed up and had a ton of SEPTA Trailpasses stolen -- Zone 2. SEPTA asking the public not to buy them. You know what this means: Cheap trailpasses! [Inquirer] • Arlen Specter to Russ Feingold: "You are no more a protector of the Constitution than am I." Russ Feingold to Arlen Specter: "Wait, you're still a senator?" [Washington Post] • This just might be the best newscaster slip-up, ever. [YouTube] Photo by jessica jeanne Posted by D-Mac at 04:52 PM | Comments (58) | TrackBack (0) May 11, 2006Leftovers: West Phila. Speed Racers
• Hey, apparently this "Google" company makes popular products. Hm. Google? I don't think that'll be successful. [Business 2.0] • William DeWeese, the democratic leader in the state house, spent $6,140 on ceramic desk coasters. Let Ceramic Desk Coastergate begin! [Bucks County Courier Times] • The 'Lead of the Day' award goes to the Daily News. Reporter Christine Olley (we don't know who this is, either): "Usually kids get tucked into bed at night with stuffed animals and blankets.¶ Yesterday, however, at about 7 a.m., a 13-year-old was found asleep on the floor of his home in the city's Frankford section with a .45-caliber pistol as police busted open his front door." [DN] • Arlen Specter wants the phone companies explain why they wispered our calling secrets behind our backs. Come on, dudes. Real true friends don't gossip about each other. But, uh, what am I going to do, give up my Verizon phone? No way. [Inquirer] • Your uncle Peter Gammons says the Phillies are really coming together (subscription req., sorry). Also: Aug 14-17, CBP. Phillies-Mets; it's the last time they play all year. Which is kind of weird. [ESPN Insider] Posted by D-Mac at 05:15 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0) April 18, 2006What A Surprise: Ex-Phillie Senator Named One Of Nation's Worst
Specter's been a senator since 1980 and a politician since the consolidation of Philadelphia (approx.), so he should be pretty knowledgeable about what it takes to be a good one. Plus, he pisses off both Democrats and Republicans, which is always a sign you're doing something right, at least. Also on the list is none other than Jim Bunning, a former pitcher for the Philadelphia Phillies. While with the Fightin' Phils, Bunning pitched a perfect game in 1964, won 19 games three times and, uh, was on the 1964 team that blew a 6 1/2 game lead in the National League with only 12 to play. His number is retired by the Phils and he's in the Baseball Hall of Fame. As a senator, though, he's been less than stellar, says Time: In addition to being hostile to staff members on the Hill and occasionally even other Senators, Bunning shows little interest in policy unless it involves baseball, according to congressional experts and colleagues. [...] Bunning exhibited bizarre behavior during his 2004 re-election campaign. He said his Democratic opponent, a child of Italian immigrants, looked like one of Saddam Hussein's sons. He refused to go to Kentucky for the campaign's only debate and took part instead from Washington. It was later revealed that he had read some of his answers in the debate from a teleprompter. You see, this is why some athletes shouldn't run for office after their playing careers are over. Although I can think of a good person to run against Bunning when he's up for re-election: Darren Daulton. That'd be quite the race. America's 10 Best Senators [Time via Wonkette] Posted by D-Mac at 01:13 PM | Comments (55) | TrackBack (0) March 13, 2006Quickies: Business as usual• That new "Residential Construction Dispute Resolution Act" that passed in Harrisburg? Yeah, it's bad for residents and good for big companies! And you thought something good could come of this. [Inky] • Rick Santorum is in negotiations for a debate with his Republican senate primary challenger -- who knew? -- John Featherman, who's one of those libertarian/socially liberal types who's Republican just, well, because. [All Spin Zone] • Automated email replies means that Arlen Specter hates his constituents. Or something. I guess. [Save Ardmore Coalition] • New lead singer for Queen: The guy from Bad Company. [Daily News] Posted by D-Mac at 11:09 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0) |
• Ahh! 
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