July 31, 2008

I've Already Ordered Three

44-pound stray cat bulges out of box [CNN.com]

Posted by D-Mac at 03:47 PM | Comments (2)

Eric Lindros Off The Market, Ladies

Kate Hudson's wasted no time in finding new companionship... the actress and Lance Armstrong just ended their relationship. [...] Sources reveal exclusively to PerezHilton.com that Hudson is once again seeing an ex-boyfriend of hers, a fella by the name of Eric Lindros.

Ahh, yes, former Flyers center Eric Lindros! One can only imagine this relationship will break up after a particularly rough night of sex sends Lindros to the hospital with a concussion.

Kate Hudson's already moved on [Perez Hilton]
Thanks, Bryan

Posted by D-Mac at 02:15 PM | Comments (5)

An Eggcellent Crime

Philip Fleck and his girlfriend Heather Darcy were out for revenge during an 18-month egging spree, police said.

The couple wanted to retaliate against friends for damages they said were inflicted upon them, but the couple also egged other people to draw suspicion away from them, according to police.

Weird thing is, if they egged around 400 people's houses and cars... how much did they spend on eggs? You have to assume they used at least a half-dozen for every egging trip; that's a couple hundred dollars. These people could have bought a Nintendo Wii for that kind of money.

Police: Couple Launched 18-Month Egging Spree [NBC 10]

Posted by D-Mac at 01:35 PM | Comments (2)

Penn Kid: Celebrate The Philadelphia Soul!

But wait! Penn's Neil Fanaroff says we should celebrate the Soul like they're World Champions!

That's nothing really all that notable, until he gets into a lecture about not supporting our local sports "dynasty."

The Philadelphia Barrage - of Major League Lacrosse - moved from Bridgeport, Conn. in 2004 and proceeded to win three of the next four championships, including back-to-back titles the past two seasons.

But for some reason, the city never embraced this squad - a squad that has remained at the pinnacle of success in the highest-level league of what is arguably the nation's fastest-growing sport and in one of the sport's hot spots. This year, after playing at Villanova Stadium the past four years, the team's poor financial status forced it to hit the road for the entire season.

Despite five years of success - yes, the Barrage are again in the title hunt despite playing "home" games in places ranging from Cary, N.C., to St. Louis to Hillsboro, Ore. - Philadelphians never opted to support the team enough to keep it.

An MLL Championship never warranted a celebration, or a parade, or even a front-page headline in Philadelphia. Now that the Barrage are gone, any joy Philadelphians could have garnered from the team's success is gone.

Wait, the Barrage are on the road the entire season? That's totally awesome. I guess we'll have to settle for not having any of that joy other cities experience when their outdoor lacrosse team wins the league title.

Update: Oh, yeah, there's a motorcade at 3-ish today down Market Street. Whoo, Soul!

Hey Philly: beggars can't be choosers [Summer Pennsylvanian]

Posted by D-Mac at 11:41 AM | Comments (3)

Boobs On The Internet

I am looking for suggestions on where I can order a boob cake. I'd like to have it by Saturday night, which is know is very short notice. Does anyone have any suggestions on a great bakery?

If I can't find one, I'll just have to make one, which I don't really want to do.

What? Who wouldn't want to make a boob cake?

Boob Cake [LJ Philly]

Posted by D-Mac at 11:20 AM | Comments (0)

The Story Of The Summer

Oh, yes. Chunky the fat cat is back on the front page! Turns out Princess Chunky is actually a male, according to her original owner. Also, look, he got top billing over Nathan Lane on Regis & Kelly!

I guess fat cats have more star power than fat gay actors.

Princess Chunky’s owners found -- are they homeless? [Inquirer]

Posted by D-Mac at 09:37 AM | Comments (2)

Abridged Daily News Columnists

Stu Bykofsky: This column is a good example of one of the problems with Daily News columns (in general). Apparently, the Turf Club is stiffing an employee out of about 14 grand. Said employee is described in terms like, "a struggling, single mother raising three young kids." Great. So? Okay, so we feel bad for her? So fuck the Turf Club? Approximately 99 percent of non-John Baer Daily News columns are written with similar emotional appeals.

Ronnie Polaneczky: See! Here's another example. It's about some trough a car hit in South Philly, and how nobody knows who is supposed to pay to fix it. But look! Even the trough has a heartwarming backstory!

The sooner [the trough is fixed] the better. Because the trough, I learned, has a noble Philadelphia pedigree.

A century ago, animal-protection advocates pushed hard for placement of troughs all over the city, where our work animals were treated so badly they'd collapse in the street from over-work and dehydration.

"There was a big, philanthropic trend in Philadelphia to install troughs and fountains for horses and dogs," says Sue Leary, president of the American Anti-Vivisection Society, whose recent 125th-anniversary publication features great photos from the dedication ceremony of the Bainbridge Street trough.

"The troughs literally saved animals' lives."

See? A heroic trough. I have to believe it's also a single parent raising a couple of feed bags on its own.

Michael Smerconish: Oh, look, it's a fake strategy memo addressed to John McCain about his vice presidential nominee. Wait, what? Like, seriously, it's addressed directly to McCain and uses the word "you" about 4500 times. What the hell is the point of this column? Didn't any editor say that? Well, ha ha, the Daily News has laid off all its editors.

(Also, if Obama picks Joe Biden like Smerconish predicts, I'm not voting for him.)

Posted by D-Mac at 08:45 AM | Comments (4)

July 30, 2008

Philly.com Is On Drugs -- Really

Be still my heart. It's like my two worlds (drug column and blog where I have made fun of Philly.com for almost three years) have collided! The current Philly.com front page is about stoner comedies. Yes, the paper that wrote about the area's "marijuana overdoses" last November has its film critic writing about movies that essentially have weed as the main character.

As you may have also noticed, the other big story tonight is: OMG the giant fat cat is going to be on Regis tomorrow everybody celebrate like gangbusters!!!

Smoking the funny stuff [Inquirer]

Posted by D-Mac at 09:02 PM | Comments (0)

Leftovers: Consensual Activities

• Another northern Bucks County town doesn't want any strip clubs in it. Says the Quakertown borough council president: "Because of what has happened in our society in the last 20 years, the boundaries have been so pushed. We have to push back." [The Intelligencer]

• Lawmakers in Harrisburg are considering allowing social clubs to install video poker machines, because gambling is a-OK as long as undesirable people don't do it. [KYW 1060]

• Meanwhile, in New Jersey a man has been arrested for allegedly running a brothel out of a vet clinic. A... human brothel, or a dog brothel? [The Star-Ledger]

• Nicotine water is back! [Reason]

Posted by D-Mac at 04:46 PM | Comments (0)

Inquirer: Improving Lives

The ranks of the homeless sleeping overnight in Rittenhouse Square have dropped over the past week.

The reason? More aggressive patrols by Philadelphia police. Front page news accounts. Maybe it's the weather.

Ha ha, so thanks to the Inquirer's stories, the cops now have to move the homeless out of Rittenhouse Square every morning. Even during the day, when they're, uhm, allowed there? "This park is only for those with homes" or "You have to be dressed a certain way to sit here" must be how it goes.

My favorite part of the article is the quote from Andy Rouse, a Center City resident: "I personally don't mind having a few of these guys around in moderation." I have to assume this guy feels the same way about alcoholics.

I really think the only way to solve the homeless problem is for the Inquirer gives a bunch of homeless people beds and Internet access, and pays them to refresh Philly.com all day. Pageviews++ and people have a place to sleep! It's a win-win situation.

A drop in the homeless in Rittenhouse Square [Inquirer]

Posted by D-Mac at 02:24 PM | Comments (1)

Washington Pot Party

Hey, look at that! Right on the front page of CNN.com, a big story about decriminalizing marijuana at the federal level. I wrote a column about this a while back.

Update: Hey, look, the government sent three people to the presser to complain!

Posted by D-Mac at 01:50 PM | Comments (4)

Fox Beats Philly.com To The Punch

On Fox 29's front page not only is there a story about the abnormally large cat, there is interactivity. And there will soon be many more abnormally large cats, one can assume.

Earlier: Fat Cat Biggest Story Locally Yesterday
Thanks, Joe

Posted by D-Mac at 12:22 PM | Comments (0)

Manny Being Philly?

It took a while for things to get rolling this year, but now we're in full Manny-leaving-the-Red Sox watch. This year, as usual, all the reporters say this is the year the Sox will finally trade Ramirez. SI.com's Jon Heyman reports it's down to the Phillies and the Marlins in the Man-Ram trade sweepstakes.

The Phillies have downplayed the possibility of acquiring Ramirez in media reports but haven't ruled it out entirely. If outfielder Pat Burrell isn't involved in the trade, one question would be whether Ramirez or Burrell could play right field for Philadelphia.

An early version of the story suggested the Phils could swap Burrell for Ramirez, straight-up, free agent-to-be for free agent-to-be. (Ramirez has two option years left on his contract, but Heyman writes he would likely want those to be dropped if he were to be traded.) Seems like a strange idea -- and one that could backfire. A trade making the Phillies' outfield the worst defensive OF in history but a lineup of Rollins-Utley-Howard-Ramirez-Burrell would be absolutely outofsight.

In closing: Ramirez won't be traded (as usual).

Update: Ken Rosenthal with the hilarious trade:

The Phillies might take Ramirez, major-league sources say, but only if the deal were a "giveaway" -- say, outfielder Geoff Jenkins and a fringe prospect. The Red Sox could not make such a deal without hurting their team unless they acquired a slugger such as the Pirates' Jason Bay or Reds' Adam Dunn in a separate trade.

He also writes the Mets have the best shot. Oh, goodie.

Marlins join Phillies atop Manny sweepstakes [SI.com]

Posted by D-Mac at 11:35 AM | Comments (1)

Other Cities' Yelp Members Much Worse

Yes, that's right: People are blackmailing restaurants into giving them free shit. If the restaurants don't comply, they're threatened with a bad review on Yelp. Truly, we have entered into the final days. From an email from a restaurateur:

Customers have begun threatening to 'Yelp' the restaurant if their demands are not met. Cafe Rouge experienced this phenomenon twice within the past month when comps were demanded with the threat that a harsh review would follow on the Yelp website if we didn't comply. The expectation of how much to comp is also at issue, where a glass of wine, an appetizer or dessert no longer suffices. People do follow through on their threats as we have witnessed. When most restaurants are struggling to pay the bills in a recession economy, bad publicity is the last thing we want to see. On the other hand, comping lavishly in response to overt threats affects the bottom line.

Hmm, I wonder if I could go into local restaurants and drop the words, "Philadelphia Will Do." It would be awesome.

I wouldn't call this place cute. Cute is an insult. All little cafes, just like babies, are cute even when they aren't cute. No instead I would call this tiny little place real. Observant individuals will notice traditional Paraguayan pieces of art, cloth, etc adorning the walls. This is why I like this place because it's true to itself. Similar to how Almaz Cafe "keeps it real" with colors of the Ethiopian flag inside, this place doesn't stray far from its roots.

This is a day and age where cafes are very vanilla even when they try to be the anti-starbucks. Ironically enough, they are the same too. They try to be the cute corner cafe, with a vintage couch here or a black and white photo there, and the waitress has a nose ring and half sleeve tattoo to give it credibility. This is not that place.

Yeah, all those cafes giving their waitresses henna sleeve tattoos and fake nose rings. POSEURS!

Posted by D-Mac at 10:56 AM | Comments (11)

A Dept. Store Return To Normalcy

Also, the story that goes along with this all-important poll has a super-awesome serious lead:

Most shelves were full yesterday at Boscov's in Plymouth Meeting Mall, but the scene of normalcy concealed the turbulence rattling the region's only surviving family-owned department store chain.

The Inquirer asks, "Will Boscov's survive?" But the real question is: Boscov's is still around? Heh. I had no idea.

Boscov's sails into retail turbulence [Inquirer]

Posted by D-Mac at 10:05 AM | Comments (1)

Abridged Daily News Columnists

Jill Porter: Jill Porter's mom moved into a retirement home and now she plays Sudoku with Will Shortz.

Posted by D-Mac at 09:06 AM | Comments (0)

Fat Cat Biggest Story Locally Yesterday

You had to know the fat New Jersey cat was going to end up as the main story on Philly.com at some point. (This was from yesterday.) If this cat was homeless and lived in Rittenhouse Square, though, the Inquirer would be calling for it to be executed.

Thanks, John

Posted by D-Mac at 08:32 AM | Comments (3)

July 29, 2008

Obama May Be All Over Pennsylvania...

... but he still knows how to defer to the local media.

A fancier sign, indeed, but the Obama camp knows the importance of placing its sign below Philadelphia Weekly's. I hope The Hopemonger stops by himself so I can try to pitch him on my "I did blow with Barack Obama and all I got was arrested" t-shirt idea.

Related: Obama ahead in local Pa. campaign offices [Inquirer]

Posted by D-Mac at 04:54 PM | Comments (0)

Sal Fasano Is Not Happy With Himself

"A disappointment," he says glumly. "My career has been a really big disappointment."

Back when Sal Fasano played in Philadelphia, the career .220 hitter had his own fan club, was cheered for being Italian and having a mustache and eventually got traded to the freaking Yankees. Apparently he's still not content with that success; this over-dramatic Reader's Digest article details how sad Sal Fasano is!

Despite steroids not being against the rules of major league baseball until like 2005 -- and probably somewhat legally obtainable with a helpful doctor -- Sal Fasano decided not to do them. Whoops! He never got any big free agent deals and now he still has to play baseball for a living at 36. Also, check our how this article ends:

Those who opted to turn to performance-enhancing drugs may well drive Mercedeses and BMWs, may well live in luxurious homes, may well boast gaudy career statistics that elicit oohs and aahs from adoring fans.

But Sal Fasano, 36 and tired, is blessed with something a thousand times greater. He is a ballplayer. A real ballplayer.

That ending was so annoying it made me want to do some steroids.

A Baseball Career Without Steroids [Reader's Digest via Walkoff Walk]

Posted by D-Mac at 02:50 PM | Comments (2)

Why Eagles Training Camp Sucks

Every year in late July, a group of millionaires known collectively as the Philadelphia Eagles head up the Northeast Extension in their giant custom SUVs, hyperbaric chambers strapped to the top. The destination: Lehigh University, in Bethlehem, Pa., birthplace of Jesus and home of Eagles training camp. Well, actually, it's Lehigh's "Murray H. Goodman Campus," which is like 40 towns over from where all the academic buildings are.

Almost every year, the mood going into training camp is kind of sour. A player or two is holding out (this year, it's Shawn Andrews for unknown personal reasons) and a bunch of players are unhappy with their contracts even though they're not holding out.

The only reports from training camp that grab anyone's attention are injuries; there's not much fan interest in who's going to end up the right gunner on punt coverage and there's really not that much writers can do besides describe the day's big hits over and over.

The only good news out of camp is, then, silence. But, no: Tons of players get hurt every year at camp. Victor Abiamiri has a broken hand, free agent signing Asante Samuel has a strained hamstring and Chris Clemons had to be rushed to the hospital today.

I scream at the TV screen whenever Charlie Manuel bunts with a perfectly good hitter in a stupid spot in May. By August, I can barely handle them. I can't take six weeks of training camp injury reports with the only real news being updates on the "important" fullback battle. Oh, boy! Another whole month of this.

Image by texas_mustang, Creative Commons license

Posted by D-Mac at 01:41 PM | Comments (1)

Great Moments In Late-July Programming

Yes, that is NBC 10, owned by General Electric, promoting the promotional week of a cable network not owned by GE. I think? Weird.

This photo is from the brief time when the Philadelphia 76ers were flirting with a name change to the Philadelphia 4Mers.

NBC 10

Posted by D-Mac at 11:00 AM | Comments (3)

Top OTC Drugs Ones That Kinda Work

What are the best over-the-counter medicines, you might ask? Well, CBS 3 studied the report and let its viewers know just what the best OTC meds are: The ones you already have in your medicine cabinet!

The best for relieving itchy skin irritations is Cortizone-10, according to a new survey from the American Pharmacists Association of five thousand pharmacists. [...] And pharmacists recommend Sudafed to clear up a stuffy nose. [...] Some other best selections from the pharmacists include Midol for menstrual pain and Unisom for a better nights sleep.

What is this new "Cortizone-10" they speak of? I can assume the group also recommends aspirin for pain -- no more sucking on the bark of a willow tree! (Also, I've been telling everyone I know that "Sudafed PE" crap doesn't work. Suck it up and get put on the government's list of potential meth cooks and get the good shit from behind the counter.)

Best Over-The-Counter Medicines [CBS 3]

Posted by D-Mac at 09:07 AM | Comments (0)

Abridged Daily News Columnists

Ronnie Polaneczky: Larry Mendte is actually pretty nice compared to.... umm... Kwame Kilpatrick, Detroit mayor! Yes, but how does Mendte compare to Football Hall of Famer Jim Brown?!

Elmer Smith: This column is about gas prices. "That was the news from Lake Wobegon when I left the country two weeks ago." What a relevant reference!

Deborah Leavy: It's about John McCain, or something. There don't appear to be any random pointless references in this one, but it was about John McCain so I kinda just skimmed it.

Posted by D-Mac at 08:19 AM | Comments (0)

July 28, 2008

Yes, Yes

As you may have guessed, there were posting problems today. Things will be back to normal tomorrow. Promise!

Posted by D-Mac at 06:44 PM | Comments (0)

Terror From The Airwaves

KYW 1060 does not want you to enjoy dinner.

Expert Warns of Radioactivity Hazard in Granite Countertops [KYW 1060 via my Tumblr]

Posted by D-Mac at 10:35 AM | Comments (1)

Abridged Daily News Columnists

There are none today, it seems. Hooray!

Posted by D-Mac at 08:05 AM | Comments (0)

July 25, 2008

Philly.com Wants Your Sex

I realize it's 6 p.m. on a Friday in July...

... but is this the best Philly.com front yet? In light of a recent morning viewing of that Saved by the Bell where Kelly studies with Screech (and everyone thinks they're dating) because she needs a good grade on her big test in order to go to the George Michael concert... yes. Yes it is.

John adds: "I would love to meet the reader that is designed for."

Update: It's already been changed! Sadness.

Posted by D-Mac at 06:09 PM | Comments (1)

Redlasso Shuts To Bloggers

Thanks to some lawsuits, Redlasso has closed to bloggers just in time to not have the International Olympic Committee drop a bomb on the company's headquarters or something. On the plus side, thousands of browsers now longer have to fear crashing when they load a blog.

Posted by D-Mac at 02:51 PM | Comments (0)

Eagles To Sign Vince Papale Next

And I know we've covered him about as much -- if not more -- than some of the players, but man, Harold Carmichael simply does not drop a pass. This notion struck up a small round of conversation with a few of us on the sidelines. It makes you wonder how anyone stopped this guy when he was in his prime. A big, sure-handed target.

Yes, this is why Carmichael was a talented receiver for 13 or so seasons in the NFL while Freddie Mitchell only lasted, like, 3. You think that might give the Eagles some ideas.

Training camp began earlier this week; as much as I love football, it takes me a few weeks to be able to stomach training camp news. I'd advise checking in with Bounty Bowl and Iggles Blog, both good Eagles sites, as well as the beat writers.

Harold Carmichael continues to impress [Bleeding Green Nation]

Posted by D-Mac at 02:22 PM | Comments (0)

Black, White And Dead Behind The Eyes

Okay, the Northeast Times is just baiting, now. First off, there's a letter in this week's edition titled, "Stop the injustice against the MOVE 9!" Right. Then, there's this:

The debate continues, in black and white

In response to Melissa S. Tulin’s letter in the July 3 edition (She’s tired of the stereotypes), I suggest that she comprehend what my original letter stated before she claims others are racist simply because they disagree with her.

This way of thinking is exactly what I was talking about. Once again, African-Americans claim that they want to be "judged by the content of their character and not the color of their skin," when reality proves otherwise.

You state that some studies suggest that white women are the main beneficiaries of affirmative action, but you somehow omit the fact that on the whole, they outscore the African-American applicants.

Secondly, you correctly state the fact that unemployment is higher among black people, but you never mention why. Statistically, blacks score lower than others and a higher percentage are incarcerated. If you were an employer, who would you hire? Lastly, as a whole, crime and the quality of life is negatively affected when African-Americans move in. If you need proof, ride throughout the city and tell me different.

Yep. And when you let white people write letters to the editor, you get the stupidest argument styles possible. If you need proof... etc., etc.

Letters to the Editor 6.24.08 [Northeast Times]

Posted by D-Mac at 01:24 PM | Comments (1)

Hats Off To PennDOT

Hegele says confusing the two boroughs, which are about 15 miles apart, while funny, isn't unusual. “I guess it gets confusing because the names are so close, and the boroughs are so close together,” Hegele said. “A lot of times we get calls for Hatfield Borough and even their mail gets sent here by mistake.”

Judy Emig, Hatboro's tax collector, said she even gets tax bills for Hatfield residents from time to time. “Fortunately, I know a lot of the tax collectors (in Hatfield) so it's more of an inconvenience than a problem,” Emig said.

Hatfield Borough officials did not return calls for comment.

Um. What would the Hatfield Borough officials have to say, anyway? I do really enjoy that last sentence, though.

Sign switching not funny in Hatboro [The Intelligencer]

Posted by D-Mac at 11:14 AM | Comments (0)

Trooper Not Into Any Kinky Stuff

So, um, this is my favorite part of the story about the state trooper who tried to set up a meeting for sex with an undercover detective. Well, he thought it was a mom and her little girls.

Silveri asked what he would be allowed to do with the children and if there would be "limits."

"Im not into any really weird stuff," he allegedly wrote, "like crapping on someone or cutting them or that sort of stuff."

Well, that's a relief, at least. Oh, yeah, Albert Silveri III was arrested. He had smartly allegedly used his state-issued laptop to talk with fake little girls online, too!

Trooper accused of arranging child-sex meeting [Daily News]

Posted by D-Mac at 10:35 AM | Comments (0)

More Fun With Philly.com

Hell, I didn't even think there was consensual sexual activity on the Main Line.

The only real drawback today is this story doesn't have comments.

Posted by D-Mac at 08:28 AM | Comments (2)

Abridged Daily News Columnists

Christine Flowers: Get this: Some outrages in other countries receive more attention than others! Also, apparently wanting to end the Cuban embargo is the equivalent of burning down the White House.

Jill Porter: Porter found something hilarious on the city's website! Apparently, when deputy L&I commissioner Eileen Evans isn't sending L&I officials to bust hippies, "She is a firmly committed Christian and seeks to have biblical principles govern her life-style and her decisions." At least that's what it said on phila.gov.

Porter was offended, naturally, and took it to the ACLU to have them get offended, too. But, whoops! The ACLU didn't care. Fortunately, the Anti-Defemation League was there to pick up the ball and run with it.

Posted by D-Mac at 06:49 AM | Comments (2)

July 24, 2008

Phillies-Mets Play At Noon For Some Reason

The Phillies may have lost to "Dancin'" Jose Reyes and the Mets last night, but they can still take the series with a win today at Shea Stadium. The game begins at 12:10, so the place will be empty since all the fans are still hung over from last night.

I'm going to try to liveblog it assuming nothing blows up tech-wise. After the jump.

11:55 -- Here's a clip from last night's game, via The Fightins:

It's kind of a shame there are no longer Veterans Stadium cats. I bet they could have split off into their own breed if they didn't knock down the place.

Noon -- In an intro, Tom McCarthy lets us know that each win in this series counts twice as much. Still no Harry the K announcing for the Phillies, which has showed fans just how much we are going to miss Harry Kalas when he's gone.

12:13 -- The Phillies lead off with Eric Bruntlett. Surprisingly, they don't get any runs off Mets pitcher Oliver Perez in the top of the first.

12:17 -- Jamie Moyer is going for the Phillies today; the World's Oldest Pitcher is actually 9-6 with a 3.90 ERA this year. He's doing much better than last year, with an ERA+ of 114 this year compared to 92 in 2007.

12:25 -- Woo-hoo, Moyer puts them down 1-2-3, which means the ump is giving him the calls he needs to pitch well today. Bodes well for the Phillies!

12:36 -- Moyer is mowing them down, helped along with some favorable pitch calls. He retires the first five, getting the Mets bench to yell at the umpire a bit.

12:39 -- Fernando Tatis, retired from baseball since around 1890 or so, is back in the majors and playing for the Mets this season. Naturally, he singles.

12:47 -- Hey, Eric Bruntlett got a hit! His average is now over .230!

12:57 -- After hitting a three-run homer last night, Jose Reyes put his finger up as he went around the bases and celebrated wildly in the dugout afterward. Right: Who cares? But the Phillies announcers care, and so we have to see it again and again and again. With two outs, Reyes walks.

1:03 -- And it's 1-0 as David Wright (the real best position player on the Mets) singles home Reyes. Moyer gets Carlos Delgado to ground out next. Another deficit against the Mets for our local baseball nine.

1:09 -- In the middle of the fourth inning, the Phillies have whiffed seven times against Oliver Perez, he of the 4.42 career ERA. Strikeouts aren't really all that worse than any other kind of out, but it's just kind of embarrassing.

1:21 -- Nine strikeouts. Still 1-0. Argh.

1:27 -- Jamie Moyer has retired seven straight now, however, and is keeping the Phillies in it. All in all this season, he's been a pleasant surprise.

1:31 -- Eric Bruntlett got a leadoff double -- !! -- but didn't try to score from third on Pat Burrell's pop out to left. The perils of trying to manufacture runs.

1:39 -- Moyer goes 1-2-3 after Howard strikes out to end the top of the sixth. Yes, the Phillies and Mets are somehow playing a 1-0 pitchers' duel.

1:42 -- Jayson Werth with a solo homer to tie the score! He got ahead 2-0 and ended up hammering it to dead center. Comcast SportsNet's feed was going haywire during the homer; who knows who actually saw it. (I saw about half of it.)

1:49 -- The Phillies announcers speculate on to why Rollins was scratched from today's lineup; they say it's not due to injury. Of course, the Phillies announcers work for the Phillies, so there's really no need for them to speculate.

1:54 -- Jamie Moyer retires the side in the bottom of the seventh, the last out on a nice sliding catch by Jayson Werth. McCarthy showers Moyer with praise like he's won the Cy Young, like he's done in every one of Moyer's starts this season, it seems.

1:58 -- How 'bout that? Eric Bruntlett shows me up again with his second double of the game. Chase Utley and Pat Burrell are up and on deck.

2:04 -- Ryan Howard actually got hit after working a 3-2 count after falling behind 0-2. That loaded the bases; the Mets finally pull out Oliver Perez for a reliever. Not that it needs to be said, but: Big at-bat coming up.

2:08 -- Jayson Werth starts 0-2; he eventually hits it to center for an easy flyout. HOW DO WE FANS LIVE THROUGH THIS?!

2:14 -- And someone named Robinson Cancel led off the bottom of the eighth with a single. Reyes sacrificed him over.

2:19 -- Carlos Delgado doubles home a pair of runs before getting tug out on his way to third. It's 3-1 going into the ninth inning. See previous all-caps sentence a few lines above.

2:26 -- Just like that: Two away. It's all up to the rapidly-declining Chris Coste.

2:28 -- Coste singles, just to drag it out a little more, but pinch hitter Jimmy Rollins grounds out and the Phillies are out of first place.

Posted by D-Mac at 11:55 AM | Comments (4)

The Unisys Sign Dilemma

Unisys has essentially said the company will not move downtown without a sign, for some reason, and some historian even testified in favor of it.

The head of SCRUB also chimed in: "Do we prostitute our visual space in order to lure them here?" The residents of the new condos at Liberty Two have filed a federal lawsuit against Unisys in an attempt to block the sign. All of this should be settled in time for the tricentennial.

June 6: Unisys Wants Sign On Liberty Two

Posted by D-Mac at 11:39 AM | Comments (2)

Abridged Daily News Columnists

Ronnie Polaneczky: I've been having technical problems posting at certain times this week (and the previous one, as well); my apologies. Fortunately, it gave me (and you) more time to let the brilliance of Jill Porter's seven consecutive rhetorical questions sink in. Thanks to this extra period of reflection, I have managed to convince myself I am totally being messed with.

Today, in Ronnie Polaneczky's column, there are seven. consecutive. rhetorical. questions.

AS ELIZABETH MATEO was getting dressed the morning after April 28 back surgery at Virtua Memorial Hospital in Burlington County, N.J., her husband noticed a rose tattoo on her belly, just below her panty line.

They had never seen it before.

Had someone entered her room in the night and touched her down there, while she was still too sedated to know what was happening? Had she been sexually assaulted? If so, by whom? A nurse or orderly? A hospital intruder?

And why a rose tattoo? Was it some kind of sick calling card, the work of a serial molester?

That these are concentrated in two paragraphs instead of seven doesn't fool me; that's totally the same exact idea as yesterday, just condensed. I can only hope Christine Flowers has something to top this one-two punch tomorrow.

Michael Smerconish: Hey, look, it's a Michael Smerconish "humor" column about how the City of Philadelphia should have fat taxes in order to encourage people to get thin. Oh, ho-ho, bwahahaha!

Posted by D-Mac at 08:53 AM | Comments (0)

July 23, 2008

Phillies' So Taguchi Beneficiary Of Famous Reverse PW Cover Jinx

After the Phillies loaded the bases in the top of the ninth, Carlos Ruiz was in prime position to make another rally-killing double play but managed to hit the ball high enough to make it just a fielder's choice; he got an added bonus when Jose Reyes screwed up and got nobody out. So Taguchi, 0-for-16 as a pinch hitter this year, came up to the plate. The recent PW cover story subject hit one over the head of (who else?) Inning-Endy Chavez -- who was thrown out twice at home last night -- and the Phils tied the game. Jimmy Rollins doubled in two more runs and the Phillies eventually won, 8-6.

After the jump, So Taguchi's game-tying hit. I have a request: Watch the Redlasso video (it's crashing my Firefox 3, so standard warning applies) and listen if you hear Sarge cheering in the background during the play. It could just be a fan, but it didn't show up on the Mets broadcast I saw in highlights.

Posted by D-Mac at 10:35 AM | Comments (6)

Philly.com Poll: City Is Lazy, Whiny

From yesterday (the totals are roughly the same still), Philly.com's poll about homelessness:

Yes, the one with the lowest number of responses was, of course, about helping people. And the #1 response was wondering why the city didn't do something about it. I guess if you pay your taxes...

Posted by D-Mac at 09:34 AM | Comments (5)

Abridged Daily News Columnists

Jill Porter: Hey, this column begins wondering if Larry Mendte is "just plain evil." (I love the moral calculus of the Daily News.)

The U.S. attorney charged him Monday with secretly accessing Lane's e-mails 537 times over five months, logging in again and again, hour after hour, morning and night, over a five-month period.

It's absolutely chilling.

Uhm, yes, "absolutely chilling." He was reading her Yahoo! Mail account. It's not the end of civilization. Then there are seven rhetorical questions in a row, each in its own paragraph!!!

!!!!

Am I missing anything from the inventory of a perfect life?

Is there anyone who wouldn't settle for what Mendte had? Even a portion of it?

How and why would he jeopardize everything to destroy Lane?

How and why would he humiliate his wife, hurt his family?

What more, as my reader asked, could he want?

To be sole anchor on the news?

For that he sold his soul, committed a crime, lost everything?

Yes, and Jill Porter spent time writing this column while people are starving and the U.S. government tortures people in the name of any one of several wars we're currently fighting.

John Baer: The Brookings Institute brought a bunch of people with degrees to Washington in order to come up with ideas to fix the Pennsylvania legislature. Two of the ideas are a best legislator award, a big contest to get people interested in politics and a giant robot duck that will destroy the state capital and the entire legislature. Amazingly, only one of those is fake.

Posted by D-Mac at 08:56 AM | Comments (1)

July 22, 2008

Ben Franklin, Mayor Put Heads Together

Hip, hip, hooray! The power brokers in this town (Mayor Nutter, Ben Franklin) are finally doing something about the homeless problem. Yes, it's "OMG THERE ARE HOMELESS PEOPLE IN RITTENHOUSE" day on Philly.com. I'm not writing about it yet because I'm willing to wait to see where they go next. It should be amazing.

Providing housing for Phila. homeless is slow going [Inquirer]

Posted by D-Mac at 12:11 PM | Comments (0)

Dan Gross: First Amendment Defender

(Fox 29, also, mentioned last night that Dawn Stensland is Mendte's wife; it wasn't really anything special, but it was kind of sad to hear Kerri-Lee Halkett be forced to say "fair and balanced.")

Mendte, incidentally, will plead guilty, according to his lawyer.

The Daily News story has some great lines, such as: "And that was just as Lane, dubbed 'anchorbabe' and the 'Latina bombshell,' had suspected." And here we go, straight out of a film noir movie:

Then, he allegedly dispensed intimate details to the Daily News of Lane's late-night confrontation with undercover New York police, in which she allegedly called a policewoman a slur, as well as confidential attorney-client communications about her lawsuits. These details then appeared on PhillyGossip.com, a blog written by Dan Gross [in the photo, with an indestructible cheerleader], and later in the Daily News.

Asked if Mendte supplied information about Lane, Gross said, "I don't discuss whether anyone is, or is not, a source of mine." Asked if he cooperated in the FBI investigation, Gross said, "Absolutely not. I have never been contacted by any investigator in the case."

Ha ha, Dan Gross is going to shut anyone down! He's ready to go to jail to protect his known source, Larry Mendte! (Unless Mendte leaked to Regina Medina or Damon C. Williams.)

The feds also found the famed Alycia Lane bikini pix on Mendte's computer, but didn't say if he was Page 6's source. If he was, Larry: Shame on you. For the first time since this scandal started I am actually mad. One, he could have released them to the public. And two, he could have at least given them to a news source in Philadelphia instead of the New York Post. We can take lawbreakers, Larry; we don't tolerate Benedict Arnolds.

Mendte faces a felony count [Daily News]
Photo via South Philly Review

Posted by D-Mac at 11:35 AM | Comments (4)

Abridged Daily News Columnists

Ronnie Polaneczky: Here's a column about a promotional event for Zipcar.

Fatimah Ali: Oh, man, it's Fatimah Ali on the sagging pants laws. You might as well just read it; it's going to be awesome. Come back after you're done and we'll discuss.

[...]

Sadly, it ended up being about that and Jesse Jackson. But it was awesome because it kept going back and forth and back and forth between the two for no reason. I don't think I've ever seen that done before.

Posted by D-Mac at 09:07 AM | Comments (0)

Chinese Millionaires And Porn

A reader sends in this screenshot from the front of Philly.com earlier. And what great stories: Chinese millionaires turned away by the Convention Center and Comcast's signing of some anti-child porn code. See, sometimes there is exciting news in the summer.

Also awesome: Chinese millionaires have invested $3 million in Stephen Starr's Continental Midtown.

Posted by D-Mac at 08:41 AM | Comments (1)

July 21, 2008

The Best Part Of The Mendte Charges

How did I almost forget? Philly.com posted the full set of charges against Larry Mendte (.pdf) on the front page, and the above (click to enlarge) is the highlight.

So, yes, at least in this instance -- and, might I add, this is the most boring instance possible -- the government alleges Larry Mendte did provide information to a reporter based on his (alleged!) email snooping.

Posted by D-Mac at 04:52 PM | Comments (1)

Leftovers: From A Slow, Hot Summer Day

• The Inquirer had a story on Rittenhouse Square's homeless population today; the story's certainly interesting, the comments are certainly exactly what you'd expect. [Inky]

• The El in back in service in West Philly. No word if those mysterious possible urban legends known as "token machines" have made it out there yet, though. [SEPTA Watch]

• Sly Fox Pikeland Pils has been named the best beer on the Main Line by Main Line Today. Hey, who knew me and that magazine shared the same taste on anything. [Beer Lass]

• In case you weren't sure, Pat Burrell does not like being taken out of games for defensive purposes, especially when the Phillies blow the lead he was taken out to protect. Yes, obviously. [Inquirer]

• The PPA might allow you to look up what parking spots are open via your phone so you can drive around the corner only to find somebody just took the spot. Progress, I guess. [KYW 1060]

Posted by D-Mac at 04:25 PM | Comments (1)

Metro Now Selling Wacky T-Shirt

Of all the promotions done by any company for any product, the strangest might be the ad that appeared in Wednesday's Metro.

Yes, Metro is selling a t-shirt with different city neighborhoods -- and, oddly enough, Delaware County -- written in wacky fonts for a whopping $16. I can't imagine anyone besides Chrissmari and me even considering purchasing this t-shirt, and (as she noted to me in IM earlier today), we're far too cheap to spend $16 on one.

I can only imagine the Metro one-liner novelty t-shirt shop on South Street isn't far behind.

Metro Philly Store

Posted by D-Mac at 02:25 PM | Comments (3)

Larry Mendte Charged By Feds

Mendte was charged with one count of intentionally accessing a protected computer without authorization. Authorities allege he checked Lane's email 537 times (in a row?!) after getting her password.

"As we continually have said from day one, Larry has been cooperating fully with the investigators. He continues to cooperate and will accept full responsibility for his actions," Mendte's lawyer said. Blah, blah, blah, jailtime is probably unlikely.

Larry Mendte to be charged today [AP/6 ABC]

Posted by D-Mac at 01:47 PM | Comments (1)

Cabbies Show Their Feelings On Passengers

As anyone who has ridden a cab in the last year or so has already guessed, Blount is alleged to have struck a rider after she wanted to pay with a credit card.

Blount says he's innocent of the assault charges. One driver told Metro the following: “We fully believe he’s innocent and will beat the charges." Pun intended, I assume.

United cabbies have elected driver accused of assault [Metro]
Photo by kiteflier, Creative Commons license

Posted by D-Mac at 12:43 PM | Comments (0)

Man Arrested For Stealing Horse Statue

The Courier-Post reports "[p]art of the horse was recovered in Pennsauken," but most of the bronze statue was sold for scrap in Camden. (And turned into glue, etc., etc.) The man arrested had four outstanding warrants in four different New Jersey communities. Highly impressive, but nowhere near a record. The theft of the statue, though, totally deserves a round of applause just for the difficulty factor.

Man held in horse statue theft [Courier-Post]

Posted by D-Mac at 12:15 PM | Comments (0)

Court In Phila. Tosses FCC Fine

Yes, apparently the court just got around to ruling on this event, which happened while I was still in college during the Patriots-Panthers Super Bowl. Jake Delhomme almost won Super Bowl MVP! Remember that? No, of course not, it was a Patriots Super Bowl win and you've hopefully put it out of your mind. Well, ha ha, now it's back in. And so is this term: "Wardrobe malfunction." It's like the second half of senior year of college all over again. For me, at least.

"The Commission's determination that CBS' broadcast of a nine-sixteenths of one second glimpse of a bare female breast was actionably indecent evidenced the agency's departure from its prior policy," the court found. "Its orders constituted the announcement of a policy change — that fleeting images would no longer be excluded from the scope of actionable indecency." Umm, yes, whatever. The little plucky underdog, CBS, has successfully challenged its fine, which would have put it out of business if enacted.

Thanks for making us side with a giant media conglomerate, FCC.

Update: Here's the ruling, in all its PDF-y glory.

Court tosses FCC `wardrobe malfunction' fine [AP/Yahoo!]

Posted by D-Mac at 11:20 AM | Comments (0)

Bees Swarm New Jersey Turnpike

Although the bees hovered around the northbound lanes for a few hours on Saturday, they didn't cause any traffic accidents or even any slowdown. (A good idea: When accidents cause gaper delays, just release thousands of bees around the area, forcing cars to speed away from the thousands of honeybees flying around.)

"Those poor bees," said Landi Simone, vice president of the New Jersey Beekeepers Association. "It would be very distressing...it's conceivable that somebody could get stung, because you've got some really confused honeybees there."

The president could not comment because he had surely been moved to a secure undisclosed location in order to protect him from the thousands upon thousands of bees, too eager to strike back at the man keeping them for so long.

The liberal bee-loving Inquirer decided to take the story a bit differently: "Thousands of bees die when hive falls onto turnpike." (The story was, naturally, written by Faye Flam.) The bees are being fostered by a local beekeeper; the owner has yet to come forward to get all of his buzzing friends.

Box falls off truck, releasing thousands of bees near Turnpike [The Star-Ledger]
Photo by aussiegall, Creative Commons license

Posted by D-Mac at 10:20 AM | Comments (0)

Newspapers Just Eat Up 'Street Justice'

Oh, you never let us down, Philly.com. Thanks for the pressing question of whether vigilante justice is warranted in 21st-century America!

You may remember Upper Darby as the suburb where a man who stabbed his son was hailed as a hero because his son did drugs. Well, our newest tale from the land with a giant "69" dotting its landscape is the stabbing death of a 48-year-old woman. The family of the slain woman went to where the alleged murderer was hiding and beat him up.

Hmm. Definitely understandable, almost certainly justifiable, but probably not legal. Cops intervened, but because they were treated nicely no charges will be filed. Yes, yes, really:

Despite the injuries to the officers, who are now on leave, Chitwood said that he doesn't expect to press charges against anyone involved in the assault because "the crowd wasn't hostile to the officers."

So, uhm, yes. Apparently "vigilante justice" is now called "street justice," and if you'd like to go where it's legal, try Upper Darby. As a commenter says, "Everytime I go online to read the news from Philly it get wrost and wrost God save use !" God save use all.

Update: Uhm, okay, newspapers, just because the Upper Darby police chief uses the phease "street justice" doesn't mean youse all have to. C'mon, people.

'Street justice' follows murder of 'saint' [Daily News]

Posted by D-Mac at 09:36 AM | Comments (1)

Abridged Daily News Columnists

Stu Bykofsky: Because the Daily News does not have a website, Stu Bykofsky needs to do a whole column of reader mail so the people can be heard.

Anyway, it's actually not a bad column because some of the letters are awesome. Case in point:

* I cannot vehemently disagree more!!! The fines are a filthy joke!!! Each fine should be five grand!!! That's right, $5,000!!!

- "Tony the Viper" Vare, Fox Chase

Fox Chase, huh? Must be hooked on the opium and underage girls.

John Baer: Ah hahaha, the way the probe into the state legislature bonus scandal began was when Terry Shaffer testified against his boss and friend, who he grew up with. Now he can't get a job in politics again, obviously, because he spoke up about illegal stuff. Stop snitchin' is alive and well!

Posted by D-Mac at 09:06 AM | Comments (0)

July 18, 2008

Phillies Trade 3 Prospects For Fat Pitcher

Click to enlarge.

Yes, the Phillies traded for Joe Blanton yesterday, sending three awesome prospects including Josh Outman, the best named player ever. Okay, I don't know if they are awesome prospects, really, but this is Philadelphia, and we are negative.

Blanton has a 4.96 ERA, but think of the problem once he discovers Philadelphia cheesesteaks. Many a fat pitcher has become a fat, out-of-shape pitcher once they've hit Philadelphia. As you can see from my simple math above, Joe Blanton plus Philadelphia cheesesteaks equals a really heavy pitcher with a poorly Photoshopped Phillies logo on him.

What's great about this trade is not too many Phillies fans have seen these prospects, but pretty much everyone everywhere hates it.

On the plus side, well, the Mets won their 10th straight yesterday, eliminating a 5.5 game deficit in just 13 days. The teams are tied for first; the Phillies play the Marlins tonight in Miami. Oh, boy, the second half of the season will surely be slow and painful, no matter how it ends up.

Posted by D-Mac at 11:42 AM | Comments (3)

Abridged Daily News Columnists

Jill Porter: Cops chased a puppy for an hour and caught him.

Christine Flowers: I love when Christine Flowers writes about Obama being snobby. (Or, rather, his supporters, but that's also his fault.) I have to assume it's some sort of super-meta-ironic irony. Right? Right???

Posted by D-Mac at 08:52 AM | Comments (0)

July 17, 2008

The Doctor Who Made Temple Proud

While researching a column yesterday, I found this excellent piece on the history of recreational drug use in America. And a decent chunk of the story concerns a doctor from Temple University.

Where, oh where, in this story, are we going to find an expert witness? Here it comes -- sure enough -- the guy from Temple University -- the guy with the dogs. I promise you, you are not going to believe this.

In the most famous of these trials, what happened was two women jumped on a Newark, New Jersey bus and shot and killed and robbed the bus driver. They put on the marijuana insanity defense. The defense called the pharmacologist, and of course, you know how to do this now, you put the expert on, you say "Doctor, did you do all of this experimentation and so on?" You qualify your expert. "Did you write all about it?" "Yes, and I did the dogs" and now he is an expert. Now you ask him what? You ask the doctor "What have you done with the drug?" And he said, and I quote, "I've experimented with the dogs, I have written something about it and" -- are you ready -- "I have used the drug myself."

What do you ask him next? "Doctor, when you used the drug, what happened?"

With all the press present at this flamboyant murder trial in Newark New Jersey, in 1938, the pharmacologist said, and I quote, in response to the question "When you used the drug, what happened?", his exact response was: "After two puffs on a marijuana cigarette, I was turned into a bat."

Who knew Batboy was from Philadelphia? This article also contains this quote from said doctor: "I wouldn't know, I am not a dog psychologist."

Posted by D-Mac at 03:29 PM | Comments (3)

Best Promotion Ever

An email from PhillyCarShare:

PhillyCarShare is partnering with Jack Johnson to offer one of our members a sweet experience. We will be awarding two ONSTAGE tickets - THE ABSOLUTE BEST seats in the house - to one of our cherished members. The show is Thursday, August 7th at Susquehanna Bank Center in Camden.

Here's how to be considered: Re-write the lyrics to your favorite Jack Johnson tune, incorporating your PhillyCarShare love. We will also accept YouTube submissions of you performing your original lyrics. Send to [CarShare] by July 28th to be considered. We'll post your submissions in our next newsletter.

Re-writing Jack Johnson songs about PhillyCarShare. Really, there is no better way to choose concert ticket winners.

Posted by D-Mac at 01:34 PM | Comments (0)

Sammy D Says Goodbye, Eh

The team's coach wouldn't comment on Sammy D's status, saying he was only no longer with the team.

The Sports Network of Canada reported that Dalembert had a confrontation with a Canadian team official.[...]

After an 86-70 loss to Slovenia on Tuesday, [ex-76ers first round bust and Canadian coach Leo] Rautins criticized Dalembert's effort in the postgame news conference, saying: "He never got on track offensively or defensively. I didn't see him leave the floor to challenge people defensively, and on the offensive end he struggled not only with his shooting but with the decision-making behind the shots."

Hey! We say that kind of stuff about Sammy all the time! I guess the idea this time is that he just couldn't take it when it was coming from a Canadian.

Either that, or he just didn't like hockey enough.

Dalembert parts ways with Canadian team [Daily News]

Posted by D-Mac at 12:55 PM | Comments (0)

Temporary Tattoo Leads To Lawsuit

In a lawsuit filed yesterday, a Camden County woman accused her orthopedic surgeon of "rubbing a temporary tattoo of a red rose" on her belly while she was under anesthesia.

The patient discovered the tattoo below the panty line the next morning, when her husband was helping her get dressed to go home after the operation for a herniated disc, her attorney, Gregg A. Shivers, said in a phone interview yesterday.

Even if no harm is meant, putting a mark on a patient for fun is probably not something a doctor should be doing. Fortunately, lawsuits always resolve fairly and everything will probably work out. Er, wait.

Surgeon sued for giving anesthetized patient temporary tattoo [Inquirer]
Photo of Rose Tattoo Cafe. Get it? Eh? Eh?

Posted by D-Mac at 11:26 AM | Comments (1)

Awful Myspace Page Makes 'DN' Cover

Hey, look, my Myspace pal from South Philly made the cover of the Daily News today! Not quite sure what's up with that cover though: Is that... a laptop? On, like, a graffiti-laden streetcorner? That is a good place to use your laptop. And with citywide Wi-Fi... uhm, nevermind.

Nice touch with the Vito Genovese photo, too.

The Daily News is all, OMG this 18-year-old drinks and smokes pot; unfortunately for him, unlike all the other 18-year-olds who drink and smoke pot, he put it directly on his Myspace page. Oh, and unlike all the other 18-year-olds who also already do that, he went and ran over two women with his car. Allegedly while intoxicated!

The cops executed a search warrant yesterday and took this kid's computer. (Weird.) The best part of the Daily News story is this:

"LOok AT ALL DATT WEeD!!!!" he wrote under one photo. "ahaha brought a POUNd just 2go 2pROM!!!!!!"

He also posted a picture of a sign, seen in many store windows throughout the city, that reads: "I proudly support the Philadelphia Police"

In the caption to that photo, Genovese writes that "i putt a dutch infront of the piggs posterr . . . "

A dutch, according to the Urban Dictionary, is a cigar wrapper that is typically used for rolling marijuana.

The Daily News feels its readers are not familiar with the song "Pass the Dutchie." The article is like 450 billion words long and is the most descriptive version of a Myspace profile, ever. I did enjoy this, though:

Some of his online friends seem to be just as oblivious to the severity of the charges facing him. One friend wrote that he was "never gettin aride" from Genovese again[.]

I don't know; wouldn't that mean the friend was pretty aware of the severity of the charges?

Alleged DUI killer's MySpace profile depicts youth consumed with money, drugs and graffiti [Daily News]

Posted by D-Mac at 09:48 AM | Comments (1)

Abridged Daily News Columnists

Technical difficulties yesterday and I couldn't post after the morning. But we're back today!

Ronnie Polaneczky: She thinks the Dalai Lama is holy.

Michael Smerconish: Ah ha ha ha Sasha Baron Cohen totally IRL trolled an entire arena full of drunk dudes. Smerconish is, of course, totally angry about this, for some reason already deciding the movie is going to make homophobes look bad or something.

Stu Bykofsky: You know what's weird? Stu's columns never actually show up with all the other columnists in certain parts of the Philly.com homepage. He's the only one, too. It's been like this for three years, but only someone who reads the DN columnists every day would be one to notice that. Okay, someone who does that and is neurotic, like me. Anyway, this column is about a comedian who lost her hand.

Posted by D-Mac at 09:24 AM | Comments (1)

July 16, 2008

Phillies Get Bad Omen At All-Star Game

When the Phillies reach the World Series this year, they will have to play on the road. (For those who didn't know, the team that wins the All-Star Game wins home field advantage for the World Series.) On the plus side, ex-Phillies closer Billy Wagner blew the save in the 8th inning in non-shocking fashion.

The Fightins have a whole two days off, then head to Miami to play the third-place Florida Marlins. Catcher Chris Coste also had a book signing yesterday in North Dakota; apparently he did not believe he was going to make the All-Star Game this year. Way to give up early, Chris! (Well, okay, I guess it was a pretty safe bet.)

AL 4, NL 3 [AP/Yahoo! Sports]
Photo by BenYankee, Creative Commons license

Posted by D-Mac at 11:32 AM | Comments (0)

The Best Political Cartoon All Week

Signe Wilkinson's take is pretty funny as well.

[via Blog Reload]

Posted by D-Mac at 10:27 AM | Comments (0)

Abridged Daily News Columnists

Jill Porter: Damn, if only Milton Street was involved in building that planned skyscraper!

John Baer: Hmm, now that they could get arrested, state legislators want some ethics reform!

Posted by D-Mac at 08:47 AM | Comments (0)

Alleged Newsstand Thief On Trial

King is finally on trial this week, and admits he hired a crane and took the newsstands. He said, though, he totally thought it was okay to do so.

The defense contends that King, who has pleaded not guilty, believes he had permission from the city’s Department of Licenses and Inspections to move them. He claims the newsstands were abandoned.

But the owners say they weren’t abandoned, and a former L&I employee has testified she met with King many times. She described him as "overbearing but not pesty," and she denies ever giving him permission to move the newsstands.

L&I often makes me so enraged it makes me want to commit some crimes, so I understand that. Things are about to get even better, though, as King takes the stand in his own defense today.

Phila. Man Stands Trial for Stealing Five Newsstands [KYW 1060]
Image by Ella Marie, Creative Commons license

Posted by D-Mac at 08:26 AM | Comments (0)

July 15, 2008

Fixing Tagging Typos

Took a shot of this a while ago and recently rediscovered it on my phone. (It's at Locust and Camac.) It's nice to see that there are some people who still care about proper grammar.

Posted by D-Mac at 03:24 PM | Comments (0)

Lead Of The Day

The next time you lament "What's the matter with kids today?," consider these three teens from the historically black Boy Scout Troop 133 in West Philadelphia.

I'll do that, Inquirer. Thanks for the advice.

Three in Philadelphia troop become Eagle Scouts [Inquirer]

Posted by D-Mac at 12:40 PM | Comments (1)

There Are No Words

Um, so this is apparently the Myspace page of Joseph Genovese Jr., who was arrested last week for driving into two Cardinals fans leaving the baseball stadium, allegedly while under the influence. I believe that's his mugshot?

Selected comments: "I KNEW U LOOKED FAMILIAR ON THA TUBE.... SRY THAT SHIT HAPPENED 2 U YO" and "damnn joe... face on the news and shit." Like most professionals, he lists his occupation as "Chronic Dealer."

Posted by D-Mac at 12:05 PM | Comments (15)

Spectrum To Be Razed; No More Circus!

Thanks to Philly.com for inexplicably running a photo of an elephant on the front page along with the Spectrum story. This actually reminded me of the best part of the old arena being knocked down: No more circus! Philadelphia just got better already.

The Delco Times had this, too, late last month.

It's official: 'Final year of the Spectrum' [Inquirer]

Posted by D-Mac at 11:41 AM | Comments (0)

Mayor Nutter Takes On Gaper Delays

So, uh, the mayor helped Dorothy Krysiuk do traffic this morning on Good Day Philadelphia. Apparently the economy is so bad, Mayor Nutter needed to pick up a part-time job, just like how Ed Rendell does Eagles Post Game Live.

Redlasso clip after the jump. (P.S. Somebody get the mayor to dance with mascots next time.)

Posted by D-Mac at 10:48 AM | Comments (7)

Keeping Mum In Important Situations

"We've been asked not to the speak to the press," he said.

Ooh, what juicy story is this about?

Oh.

And on the hit list is the Starbucks kiosk at the Cherry Hill Mall. Employees, so-called "baristas," were given notice on Friday.

Yes, the public shall never know why this particular mall kiosk closed. There is some hope, though; if only a Cherry Hill Starbucks version of Deep Throat were to emerge.

What's also great about this Inquirer article is how "Pennsylvania has dodged the bullet" since no Starbucks are closing here -- yet. I think I'm going to faint.

Bad news brewing; S.J. Starbucks to close [Inquirer]

Posted by D-Mac at