Nov20 |
 |
Elmer’s Glue Vandalizes NE Philly Churches
Up in Northeast Philly, a bunch of churches were vandalized by somebody (probably punk kid atheists) putting glue on the locks. Somebody went up and down Tyson Avenue in Tacony/Mayfair, gluing the locks and breaking keys off in the doors of eight churches. How many churches are there in this town? I feel like there’s one for every resident. Anyway, guess who apparently got left alone: Catholic churches. Yeah, somebody managed to vandalize eight churches in Mayfair and not hit one Catholic church. That has to be intentional. Here’s the head of the Tacony Baptist Church: “It’s really comical. They keyed that door and instead of jumping up and down smoking, I just thank God, because the devil is trying to tell us we are doing something right for the Lord.” Hey, turning the other cheek? I thought Christians weren’t in to that anymore. Anyway, the best part of this story is definitely the graphic KYW 1060 came up with. Did they really use Elmer’s glue? Or am I just supposed to work a Barbaro joke in here? Vandals Keep Phila. Worshippers Stuck in the Cold [KYW 1060] |
|
|
|
They probably committed all of this tomfoolery at the DEADLIEST TIME OF THE DAY. Also, can someone translate what the head of the Tacony Baptist Church said, because it makes absolutely no sense to me.
Simple Johnny, when something bad happens to a church: it is a test from God, and proof that God approves of their mission.
This is opposed to when something good happens to church: it is a gift from God, and proof that God approves of their mission.
Go back to church where you belong… well, if you can.
OMG the whole “Go to fucking church” thing was totally worth it for that comment just there.