April 03, 2007
Daniel McQuade Deathwatch: The Hunt Is On
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VVM reportedly doesn't want the other papers PW's parent company, Review Publishing, owns -- South Philly Review, Southwest Philly Review, Atlantic City Weekly. Perhaps Brian Tierney will snap those ones up instead; I don't know. But, for now, things are in some sort of holding pattern. Or not. We don't know here at PW!
But back on point: There is an outside -- read: definite -- chance that, under a new owner, I will be fired, or at least Philadelphia Will Do will be shut down. Some newspapers don't like the idea of a blog without much original reporting commenting on the news, as these blogs tend to be popular no matter how bad they are (e.g., Philadelphia Will Do) and newspaper companies can't have that.
Of course, I don't know if I'm going to be fired; it's mere conjecture on my part. Some of you might be saying, "But Dan" -- or, possibly, "D-Mac" -- "are you just doing this to perhaps shame your new bosses into not firing you?"
No... but... hmm. That's a good idea.
As you may have guessed, I've already started trolling Craigslist for jobs in addition to trolling Craigslist for sex. So far, searching for jobs is going about as well as searching for sex, but there was one ad that caught my eye, one that could at least give me a place to live while I figure out if I have any freelancing contacts I haven't burned bridges with yet:
The owner of a home in the Main Line is seeking responsible candidates for the position of house sitter. The position would be available for several months or up to a year or more.
If you would like to be considered for the position please email the following:
- A) Why you are qualified for the position.
- B) What positions of responsibilty you have held in the past.
- C) A resume and/or a copy of your DD-214 if possible
- D) Any references if possible
- E) A passport style photo if possible
If you are unwilling or unable to email sections A or B then you will not be considered for the position.
Hmm, I can do this! And I'm super-excited about this job, because the ad is super-patriotic, with photos of George W. Bush, Dick Cheney and 9/11 attached to the ad. I suppose I will have to sign a loyalty oath to get this housesitting job, but that's okay.
Let's try it out right here.
- A) I am so qualified for this position. I have lived in a house or apartment for my entire life, and I've yet to knock any of them down or murder anyone in them. I am very experienced at sitting on a couch and watching TV, sitting on a couch and playing video games, standing in front of a TV and playing video games (if we're playing Nintendo Wii) and similar house activities.
- B) My positions of "responsibilty" have been numerous, but my main job for the past year and a half has been blogging. While I began blogging simply by making hackneyed jokes copied from other, funnier writers, I've gotten to the point where I now have my own hackneyed jokes. I think this shows I could have my own faster cleaning techniques after a few months in your house, which would leave me more time to sit on the couch and play Xbox.
- C) I haven't updated my resume yet -- since that would require "effort" -- but I do have my DD 214, the form one gets when he or she is discharged from the U.S. armed forces. Unfortunately, I never served in the military, so this form is simply blank. But my grandfather was a Marine, I could probably dig up his discharge papers and use them.
- D) My references include all my commenters on this blog, even the ones who wish me death because I think pugs are ugly. Please contact me for emails.
- E)
Okay, housing should be secure once these people get back to me. How could they turn me down?
$1 / 5br - House Sitting Opportunity / Housesitter [Craigslist]
Archives: Daniel McQuade Deathwatch
Posted by D-Mac on April 3, 2007 12:50 PM
Posted to Craigslist
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Comments
If you got fired I'd be pissed, since PWD is definitely one of the blogs I read every day.
If that were to happen you should take the blogging thing up on your own. There's people out there who make real money off of that you know just doing it for themselves. Not me mind you, but yeah.
Plus you already have a readership base that could follow you over (I assume.)
Posted by: Lou at April 3, 2007 05:41 PM
Hey blogs like Philebrity gives your form of journalism, a black eye. How could they get it so wrong posting exclusive sale of PW to Village Voice! Even gawker jokes about the inaccuracy @ Philebrity- maybe they read the Hart Scott Ridino filing??
Maybe Philebrity's headline tomorrow will be Dewey Wins the election & narrowly beat out DMAC!
Posted by: antiSweeney at April 4, 2007 12:00 AM
more importantly where can *I* get paid to blog..
i mean.. i blog while I'm getting paid--but that's getting paid to do other things :P
Posted by: chrissmari at April 4, 2007 01:46 PM
I was trying to raise one eyebrow -- a la The Rock -- but I apparently can't do that. I need to scratch pro wrestler off my list of potential jobs, I guess.
Posted by: dmac at April 3, 2007 02:32 PM