Play Ball! Maybe! If The Rain Holds Off!

The above is the most exciting thing about the 2006 Philadelphia Phillies baseball season: They’ve moved the left-field wall back and made it higher.

This will, allegedly, cut down on home runs (and, really, I see no reason it wouldn’t). The fans, apparently, were clamoring for fewer homers, less trotting and long flyouts to the wall. Because the thing that makes baseball so damned exciting is long flyouts to the wall. Then again, the previous wall dimensions were a little short, since David Bell once popped up a bunt over the 125-foot wall in left. (It was his only hit of the year.)

Okay, I kid, I kid. The most exciting thing about the 2006 Phillies season is where that photo of Citizens Bank Park came from, The Baron’s Corner, a blog by Phillies PR man Larry Shenk! And there’s another blog, Phillies Fun & Games with John Brazer, written by, uh, John Brazer about, uhm, fun and games, which currently has one post Welcome to the fun and games. Hot dog!

Okay, okay, the Phillies management blogs aren’t the exciting part of the season, and neither is the new wall at Citizens Bank Park. The real exiting thing this year is, well, take your pick:

• Jimmy Rollins has hit in 36 consecutive games. The National League record is 45 (44 in one year and 1 in another) and the all-time record is, of course, 56. Rollins’ streak began too late for him to take a shot at the single-season record, but, hey, who knows what he can do?
• Ryan Howard and Chase Utley are, seriously, everyone’s new favorite Phillies. Underrated defensively, monsters at the plate, hard workers, hustle guys, and Howard even has a bit of personality to go with his play. (Utley, I believe, is actually a zombie.)
• Pat Burrell and Bobby Abreu, the corner outfielders, are set to have really strong seasons. Or be traded. Either way, they should bring some value to the team, as long as Burrell can cut down on the lunging swings he’s prone to and Abreu can continue to get on base at an historic clip. (If he gets 100 walks this year, he’ll tie the record for most 100-walk seasons.)
• The starting rotation looks better than it did a few weeks ago, with Mariners castoff Ryan Franklin in the bullpen and a healthy, impressive-looking Gavin Floyd at the No. 5 slot in the rotation. If John Leiber and Brett Myers can have strong seasons once again — as well as new starter Ryan Madson, a great guy out of the bullpen the last two years — the Phils might be able to contend after all.
• Abraham Nuñez is starting at third today! And not David Bell!

That’s just a short list I was able to type up in five minutes. It’s baseball! There’s 25 players (and no more Tomas Perez), 162 games and tons of shit to do at the ballpark, including some sort of swimming pool gimmick on Thursdays. But if it leads to hot chicks in bikinis and shirtless muscular dudes, I don’t think anyone will have a problem with it.

The season begins today at 3 p.m., John Lieber vs. the Cardinals’ Chris Carpenter — if they get the game in. I’m not going to liveblog it, since that gets a little tedious and you can all follow along on your favorite sports website, but I’ll post updates every two innings or so until the game is over.

That is, unless they play it. But it’s not pouring right now, and since they haven’t cancelled the game yet, they have to pay the vendors, security, groundscrew, &c… so, you know what, they’re on for the game.

Let’s play ball!

Welcome to the fun and games [Fun & Games with John Brazer]
Citizen Bank Park dimensions [The Baron's Corner]