September 30, 2005

Week in Rock

• Bill Cosby responsible for PNI buyouts; speaking of buyouts, and by buyouts we mean layoffs, we came up with some ways to save some careers.

• Professional pick-up artists don't get girls.

• Apparently, PW is all about the shit.

• Northeast Philly: big Bushers and Republican Apprentice candidates.

• Middletown police were busy doing the oh-so-important job of taking down unfunny drug humor from the public eye this week.

• Burger King of Bling?

• Finally, Herb Denenberg answers questions about the rectum.

We'll be back Sunday with Eagles stuff. Be safe this weekend.

Posted by D-Mac at 04:00 PM

Link Dump: Emptying the notebook

Like a beat guy for the Phillies during a rainout at the Vet, I'm emptying my notebook. It's the end of the week!

• An interview with Matthew Lesko, aka the guy with question marks on his suit. Also includes the phrase "governmental rape" and an admission by Lesko that he shouldn't have a job. [Black Table]

• This is the darkest day in my Friendster history since one of my exes registered a profile just so should coulds send it to me with "In a relationship" checked off. If I remember my password, I'll check out my zero views. [Gawker]

• Get this: the Inquirer broke the Judy Miller-is-free story. [CJR]

Okay, my notebook is small.

Posted by D-Mac at 03:45 PM | Comments (62) | TrackBack

Lil' Kim blogs, immediately hired by Inquirer

Yeah, yeah, we know that this has been covered lots of places today. But I must report: Lil' Kim has a blog -- "A Year and a Day" -- and she's going to be updating the general public on her stay at the Federal Detention Center at 7th and Arch.

Frankly, we don't get why they just don't let her out into the world. Haven't the people in the government heard how important citizen journalists are? Haven't they heard how cool, how influential, how groundbreaking blogging is? We here at Philadelphia Will Do demand that Lil' Kim be freed from jail so she can update her blog more often. Frankly, even a statement a week isn't enough. If citizen journalist Lil' Kim isn't able to blog unemcumbered, how can we take anything in the prison system seriously?

From what Kim has said so far, though, she's doing okay in our fair city, limited blogging opportunities notwithstanding:

Of course, I wish I could be out to celebrate the release of my new album this week, The Naked Truth but instead, I am looking to take advantage of this time to work on my personal development. Thank you to all for your continued support. (Emphasis Kim's.)

One of the comments to her post is: "JESUS CHRIST was in prison and he kept his head up." Word. Her lawyer also comments in her post:

I was amazed at just how good Kim looked on my two visits to see her in prison last week. Even in a jumpsuit, Kim still has the style and swagger of a star.

Not guilty, y'all got to feel me.

Lil' Kim's first statement from lockdown [A Year and a Day]
A Year and a Day

Posted by D-Mac at 02:40 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack

QUESADILLA ANGUISH AT TEMPLE

An editorial from the Temple News:

The Rite Aid on Broad and Susquhanna streets is a haven for employee rudeness. Many times when customers bring items to the checkout counter, the cashier - deadpanned and disinterested - will not say how much is owed, but expects the customer to read it on the register screen while impatiently waiting for the money. How is the customer supposed to know the bill if the cashier doesn't say it? Similar occurrences were no stranger to the Rite Aid's next door neighbor, the recently demolished McDonald's (I wonder why).

Great deception has been taking place at the Freshens Smoothie Company in the university's Student Center. The employees get a tremendous kick out of leading their customers to believe that they've included the protein booster into the drinks when, in reality, they've done no such thing. Perhaps there is no better time to see customer service at its worst than during the fourth meal hours at the Student Center. Many students have experienced the anguish of ordering quesadillas at Taco Bell, just to be told by an employee that the quesadilla machine is broken, while a co-worker can be seen surreptitiously eating one in the back.

First off, I'd like to offer to the editors of the Temple News: I will gladly pay your $100 fee for a Pulitzer application to submit this in the commentary category, as long as you pay me back when you win.

I love the singular in the staff editorial. I love the anguish while ordering quesadillas. I love the tone when referring to the workers at the Rite Aid. And, mainly, I love that Temple kids are "told by an employee that the quesadilla machine is broken, while a co-worker can be seen surreptitiously eating one in the back."

Out of service [Temple News]

Posted by D-Mac at 02:22 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack

The story so nice, they ran it twice

Here's a comparison of two different stories in the Daily News today (click to enlarge):

And, up close, in the regular Daily News:

And in the Eagles' playbook pullout in today's DN:

Hmmmmm...

All work and no prey / Pulling out stops [DN, neither version online]

Posted by D-Mac at 01:01 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

The list: PNI expendables

I can't believe I got this. Somebody sent me a list of just who's going to be laid off if the Inquirer and Daily News don't get their 100 buyouts and/or they don't start churning along at a higher than low-ish double-digit profit margin.

This is (allegedly) straight from the desk of Joe Natoli. I am just the messenger. Please don't shoot me or blame me if you are on this list.

Gulp.

Man, they're going to be getting rid of a lot of people.

Update: Oh, I forgot. Ba-ZING!

Posted by D-Mac at 12:46 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Everything is McNabbulated

I still can't get into the Philly.com chats, since, you know, they use some sort of Java program powered by BASIC and hamsters and some of us have computers that don't support that.

But John from Phillyist checked in with information on today's ongoing chat:

i just went into the phillytalk chats for phil sheridan and i saw that Carrie Rickey - or more likely, someone parading as Carrie Rickey - was there and asked, "Carrie, should the Eagles see 'Everything Is Illuminated' this weekend?

he answered, "I'll have to field that one. I think they'd be better off seeing Serenity."

i followed-up his answer by asking him if he didn't like eugene hutz in 'illuminated' and he said that he thinks they're better off seeing an action movie than a holocaust movie

People then, apparently, moved on to serious questions, ruining the chat. Way to control your chat, award-winning headline writer Peter Mucha.

Posted by D-Mac at 12:38 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

And boy are my arms tired!

Oh, Temple kids:

Kate Moss gave me a beautiful public apology for getting busted on major snow bunny behavior - I haven't seen lines that long since Star Wars was in theaters.

Lindsay Lohan did her part to make me feel special on my special day of specialness - by dying her hair back to signature red and packing some weight on in the bra. Missed you, Linds!

This is like the fake Jackie Harvey column on The Onion, only less intentionally funny and less unintentionally funny. Those kids on N. Broad sure know how to do their one-liners.

Dirt: Birthday edition! [Temple News]

Posted by D-Mac at 11:32 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Great moments in advertising

Oh, I'll pick up a new Dodge right away, then.

Posted by D-Mac at 11:21 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Watch out, Penn football team

A friend forwarded this along yesterday, and we must say the Penn football team sure is going to have some trouble stopping this man's ground game:

As Brown senior running back Nick Hartigan prepares for the Ivy League season opener at Harvard, he has become an amazing candidate -- for both the Walter Payton Award and a Rhodes Scholarship.

When all is said and done in his career, if you multiple Hartigan's rushing yards by his grade-point average, the result might well be the highest number of all-time. (Obviously, this is not a statistic that anyone has -- or will -- ever produce.)

As my friend said, "I guess he plans to rush for infinity yards the rest of the season."

Quite the candidate [Ivy League Sports]

Posted by D-Mac at 10:49 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack

Byko-out

Oh, Lordy, Lordy, thank you that Byko is not taking the buyout so we can continue to read such important topics like this.

And no, we didn't read the column.

You've got male [DN]

Posted by D-Mac at 10:36 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Bad? What bad?

Ouch, Johnny. Ouch.

Good and bad in playing D-Mac [DN]

Posted by D-Mac at 09:50 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Why the city papers should stick to the city

We know the Daily News is going to be the crime and sports paper after the 25 firings -- goodbye, features! -- but perhaps they should stick with crime in, you know, the city. And, also, we know the Inquirer wants those oh-so-rich Narberth readers, but there are other suburbs, too.

A comparison:

Philadelphia Daily News:

The identities of the two Newtown Borough officers were not released last night. The dead officer was 46 and was shot in the head. The wounded officer is 31 and suffered a gunshot wound to the chest.

Philadelphia Inquirer:

Suddenly, he took one of the officers' guns and began shooting, police said. The volley wounded a 46-year-old officer in the head, and a second officer, age 31, in the chest. A technician was also hit. None of their names was released.

Bucks County Courier Times:

Police said drunken-driving suspect Robert Anthony Flor shot and killed Newtown officer Brian Steven Gregg of Middletown and wounded fellow officer James Joseph Warunek of Fairless Hills and an unidentified hospital worker.

Note: Yes, we're guessing that the Courier just updated its story in the morning. But, hey, there's no reason to let facts in the way of an easy joke.

Posted by D-Mac at 09:38 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

Northeast Philly: Not near Temple

Hey, 34th Street! You know I love you, right? Good. So please take this to heart.

Northeast Philly doesn't start until way north of Broad Street and Cecil B. Moore Avenue. Even Penn kids are smarter than this, okay?

Welcome to the 'Illadelph [34ST]

Posted by D-Mac at 09:27 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

September 29, 2005

Philly Blogicized: Beanie is back

• The Man: Always tryin' to keep Beanie Sigel down. Another Beanie trial begins Monday. [Beanie Blog]

• Young, snarky writer writes for New York Times; other young, snarky writers respond with snark. [Gawker]

• Will Bunch promised us a "baseball conspiracy theory," though I don't know why baseball would conspire to get the Padres in the playoffs. Seriously, I've met like one Padres fan in my life -- Hi Ilana! -- do they have any others? [Attytood]

• Dear Ashley Smith: We can do crystal meth together any time you want. [Blinq]

Posted by D-Mac at 03:56 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

Breaking: Aging hippies in birkenstocks left powerless today

From XPN:

Shortly after 2pm today a power outage occurred in the Roxborough area of Philadelphia, causing our transmitter to lose power. The power company is working on the problem.

Thanks for your patience as we work to get back on the air!

Geeze, on the drive home some people are going to have to listen to NPR. Somewhere, Terry Gross is smiling.

Listen Live! [XPN]

Posted by D-Mac at 03:09 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

I need a pick-me-up

So like tons of you (read: three) IM'd me after reading my last post and asked for the full list of Lingo for PUAs, or "pick-up artists."

There are two options here, really:

1. This lingo is all made-up bullshit.
2. Pick-up artists never pick-up women, since nobody who uses these terms could ever actually have sex with a woman.

Take your pick, you sarges.

Posted by D-Mac at 02:55 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

Also, "sarge" means "to pick up women." I call bullshit.

Today's Metro has a little interview with Neil Strauss, the Rolling Stone reporter whose new book is about his two years infiltrating a secret society of pick-up artists. Apparently, this is a non-fiction book, though the slang in this sidebar to this interview -- AFC is apparently slang for "average frustrated chump," a guy who can't get laid -- reminds me too much of the whole New York Times "Great Grunge Hoax" debacle to be real.

Anyway, reporter Dorothy Robinson interviews the now smooth-as-silk pickup artist Strauss, and the following end their exchange with this:

Jesus, you two, get a room.

U.S. Editions [Metro]

Posted by D-Mac at 01:43 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

The Phillies: it's over, but hey, free paint

Last night's viewing for the Philadelphia Phillies was like a good Irish wake: lots of drinking, lots of heckling and a good old fashion stomping of those Flushing boys.

The stadium was more positive than I really expected it to be, with the fans all seeming resigned to the Phillies missing the playoffs for the 12th straight year. Jimmy Rollins hit in his 33rd straight game, which is good, but it's too bad he was pretty horrid until the last month of the season. But, hey, 33 games in a row.

Bobby got his 100th RBI and Chase Utley got his 100th, too, although the scoreboard put up a big sign that said "Congratulations on your first 101 RBI season, Chase!"

It was fan appreciation night, which meant lots of giveaways, such as a year's supply of Skippy peanut butter, a year's supply of Big Macs, a year's supply of Happy Meals and a year's supply of Turkey Hill ice cream.

The best giveaways, of course, were the chance to dance with the Phanatic during the fifth inning, won by a man with less rhythm than a Republican, and a $250 gift certificate to MAB Paints, which, by my rough estimate, could get you about 13 cans of paint, if paint is $20 a can (including tax) and the MAB people are running a buy 12, get 1 half off sale.

By the end, it was all about heckling the Mets' relievers, including one Tim Hamulack, who threw exactly five warm up pitches before coming in and giving up 5 runs in two-thirds of an inning.

All in all, a good end to the season. In some ways I just think the Phillies could have appreciated their fans more by making the playoffs. Or at least giving out a little more free paint.

Phillies 16, Mets 6 [AP via Yahoo!]

Posted by D-Mac at 11:07 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack

The Weekly Press, bastion of journalism

You know, sometimes I forget that The Weekly Press actually exists, since I'm busy reading more important publications, like Lucky, The Magazine About Shopping. But this week, contributing editor Donald True Van Deusen -- which sounds faker than Faye Flam -- waxes esoteric about the newspaper industry.

He also takes a shot at the label that pays me:

The highly successful, widely circulated, free weekly newspapers that are run by and for youth continue to pour forth scatological terminology in headlines and body copy as if that made them funny, brave, or honest. Is that what we can expect from tomorrow's newspapers?

Hey, Donald, reading an article by you is like eating shit.

Newspaper obits [Weekly Press]

Posted by D-Mac at 11:02 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Freshman negative 15

The Daily News has a big ol' story today on the "Freshman 15," which wasn't really too much of a problem for me, although that "Sophomore-Junior 45" really bummed me out after a while.

Anyway, they interview a few girls in college, including University of Delaware student Nicky Hare, who gained five pounds in her freshman year.

So, what, gaining five pounds made her weigh 38 lbs. total? Gee, thanks for setting a good body image example, Daily News.

Dining Hall 101 [DN]

Posted by D-Mac at 10:30 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

It's like a conservative blog, in print form!

The Northeast Times, bridging communities:

Memo to anti-Bushers

This is for the President Bush haters and welfare moochers: For the people who claim Mr. Bush hates blacks, I say, shove it. For the people who hate Bush, I say, drop dead. And for the welfare moochers — blacks, whites, whatever — go to work and quit having babies. Get a life. The taxpayers can’t take it anymore.
Jerry Foglia
Wissinoming

Actually, this rises above the kind of debate offered on most blogs.

Memo to anti-Bushers [Northeast Times, fourth letter]

Posted by D-Mac at 10:12 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Had I known there was a war going on...

A friend clicked on an Army National Guard ad on Philly.com and saw this pop up onto his screen:

See the world! Defend your country! Possibly lose a limb! Get three free iTunes downloads!

Yeah, this will work.

Receive 3 FREE iTunes music downloads when you sign up to be contacted by the Army National Guard! [Army National Guard]

Posted by D-Mac at 09:34 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack

Jenice Armstrong: Taking the tough positions

Oh, Jenice. Now that your week of Lil' Kim columns is done and you can't put your friends on Sexy Singles for almost another whole year, I'm glad you've decided to tackle the tough issues in today's society:

That's why - as hokey as it sounds - I'm pulling for the 10 sets of parents scheduled to marry today in Brooklyn, N.Y., at a mass wedding that's part of "Marry Your Baby Daddy Day."

Even if it is a clever publicity stunt dreamt up by novelist Mary Ann Reid to promote her latest book, "Marry Your Baby Daddy," (St. Martin's Press) which hits stores this month.

If you didn't follow that, Jenice hopes it works out for couples who already have a child together who are getting married today.

What's next, a pro-tiger cub column?

Moms shun marriage [DN]

Posted by D-Mac at 09:29 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Northeast Philly Story of the Day #2

This gem is the lead story in this week's Northeast Times -- and don't worry, we'll get to the letters pages soon, and, yes, there is a ton of stuff. It concerns a pot-belled pig that is causing a neighbor to be annoyed and sue to force the owners to get rid of him.

The pig was a gift to Charlie Saunders when he retired from the post office a few years ago. His quote about his gift:

"I wanted a long-legged blonde, not a pig," he joked.

Ba-ZING!

This little piggie [Northeast Times]

Posted by D-Mac at 08:27 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Northeast Philly's version of a celebrity candidate

There is a ton of news going on in Northeast Philly today. No, no, nothing important -- it is Northeast Philly -- but it's important in a Northeast Philly way.

For example, check out this big campaign shaking up for the 2005 congressional race:

A former reality television star appears to be emerging as the top Republican challenger to U.S. Rep. Allyson Schwartz.

Raj Bhakta, who appeared on NBC's The Apprentice 2, is seeking backing to run next year against the freshman Democrat in the 13th Congressional District.

"I've always had an interest in public office," he said.

Wow! What's next? Richard Hatch running for U.S. Senate? That dwarf from The Amazing Race running for the House? Bam Margera running for president? That fat woman from America's Next Top Model running for dog catcher?

The possibilities are endless!

He hopes voters will say 'you're hired' in '06 [Northeast Times]

Posted by D-Mac at 08:20 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

September 28, 2005

Philly Blogicized: Early Friday night ideas

• Apparently Tom Delay was indicted. We decided to link to the Philly blog that sounded the happiest. The exclamation points really sold us. If you had used an emoticon we would have collapsed under a pile of rainbows and baby lions. [Tattered Coat]

• I mean, honestly, what else would you do on a Friday night but make phone calls on behalf of a politician? [dragonballyee]

• Franz Ferdinand listening party this Friday at Tattooed Mom's! Oh, snap. [Badminton Stamps]

• You know, I've lived in this town my whole life, but I was unaware of this place's ping-pong heritage. [Philly Future]

Posted by D-Mac at 04:10 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

The layoffs, they are a-comin'

E-Deep Throat just forwarded us a memo from Inky Editor Amanda Bennett. We hope she (or he?) keeps forwarding to us each week.

It's long-ish, and there's a lot of inside baseball, but here's what you want to know:

18 applied (17 Guild, 1 Independent)

4 accepted

Yikes.

After the jump, the rest of the memo, which at least soothes our fears that the new Inquirer will be any more interesting than the old one. Actually, they're planning for it, which is a good start. We'll see how it actually works out.

-----Original Message-----

From: Bennett, Amanda
To: Inquirer
Sent: 9/28/2005 2:20 PM
Subject: Weekly Progress Note

To the newsroom:

As part of my pledge to be as open and transparent as I can be during this difficult process, I promised weekly emails with at least three sections:

I. Progress on developing the new newsroom plan
II. Expressions of interest in the buyout
III. Answers to frequently asked questions

Here is this week's message.

I. Progress: We met yesterday off-site at a room next door at the Board of Education to begin the planning process. Present were me and Anne, deputy managing editors, department heads and a few deputies sitting in for their absent department heads.

Our goal was to get as clear a vision for an excellent newspaper with 75 fewer people as possible. We spent several hours working on defining the core values of the newspaper – the things that we can't let go of, even as we get smaller - things like our ambition, our watchdog journalism, our personality and voice, and our commitment to reaching all the readers in our region.

We also spent several hours envisioning what our future was going to look like, and how we needed to reorganize, not just to get smaller, but to face a future full of changing media demands. Our commitment to online, and to multi-media journalism, was a centerpiece of that discussion.

We also talked about the way the newsroom is organized, and about the fact that with 75 fewer people, we will need to look at creative ways of organizing ourselves to get our work done more efficiently, and to continue to be ambitious.

At the end, we organized four committees, each of which will be led by a team of department heads.

1) The transition team – will handle immediate issues of continuing to produce a paper of high quality as people are leaving. This team will help with a range of tasks including helping me with communication, job executions, and with helping the paper plan appropriate farewells for the people who are leaving.

2) The new organization team -- will work on the larger issues surrounding preparing our newsroom for the future.

3) The new media integration team - will work on fully integrating our online and multimedia group into our existing departments.

4) The new regionalism team – will work on how better use of investigative stories, narrative, online, and lifestyle reporting can help us find a better way of covering our region in ways that are compelling for our suburban readers.

II. Expressions of Interest in the Buyout

18 applied (17 Guild, 1 Independent)
4 accepted

I got rid of Part III, since it was fairly useless to an outsider. Don't worry, you're not missing anything.

Posted by D-Mac at 03:45 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

Mary Jane's Last Dance

Apparently everything in Bucks County is a-okay, because this strikes us as a ridiculous waste of time -- as well as a violation of free speech, but, hey, we're not a political blog here.

Read the full story, but here's some excerpts:

Middletown Detective Daniel Baranoski went shopping last week at Spencer's Gifts in the Oxford Valley Mall last week. [Editor's Note: Oh, that Bucks County Courier Times!]

Baranoski paid $64.62 for a "water bong," sometimes referred to as a hookah in the Middle East, and three posters depicting marijuana use.

He also bought a poster of three youngsters sitting on the floor in front of their mother's couch smoking a marijuana cigarette or joint. A pack of rolling papers, bag of marijuana and other joints are at their feet. The poster reads: "Child Hood" followed by "Johnny likes skinny girls, but he never turns down a fattie!"

On Monday night, Baranoski was back - this time with a search warrant.

By the time he left, he took away about $5,000 worth of merchandise either used to smoke marijuana or depict its use. On the same night, Bensalem detectives were over at the Spencer's Gifts at Neshaminy Mall seizing several bongs from that store.

...

Detectives took shot glasses, dishes, bowls, Frisbees, CDs, magnets, sneakers, headbands, stationery, lighters, pins, bracelets, key chains, cookie cutters and dozens of other "marijuana" merchandise from the Oxford Valley store. The pieces to one chess set were various sized marijuana leaves.

...

Police noted that before they served the search warrant they chased a half-dozen pre-teens and teens out of the store.

Then, they confiscated a "cigarette," sometimes referred to as a fag in the United Kingdom.

Items seized from mall shop [BCCT]

Posted by D-Mac at 03:27 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

Important government funds went to this

I know that government waste is always going to happen, because it's government, and "waste" should probably follow it just about every time it's mentioned. But I really don't know why we need barney.gov, the official website of President Bush's older dog.

Before the election, there was a "Barney Photo of the Day" updated like clockwork, but since then it's slowly died down to "week" and now "month," apparently. (I guess before the election they wanted to get that all important Scottish terrier breeder vote.) Take a look:

So, basically, this pooch gets an official dot-gov domain, films made about him and an occassional photo posted to the website. Hey, Republicans! You want to cut programs to fund Hurricane Katrina cleanup and relief? How about you start with barney.gov?

Also, I wonder if this is the safest thing in the world for Barney:

barney.gov [The Freakin' Federal Government]

Posted by D-Mac at 02:40 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

How to write an article: a guide for bloggers

Are you a blogger? Sure you are. Everybody has a blog, except for Noel Weyrich. And sometimes bloggers get to write articles in print or online publications that actually pay them. (Sometimes people get paid to blog, too, though we've been told those are just rumors.)

Anyway, I've put together a little guide to what you should reference in your article:

• Reference blogging: "With snark like that, you'd think Ebert were a blogger." Check.
• Bash the (evil tone) mainstream media: "Glenn 'Hurricane' Schwartz and his 'team coverage' on NBC 10 were all going, 'It's going to get even hotter!' -- you could actually hear the exclamation points..." Check.
• Write a name you can't pronounce: "Saparmurat Niyazov." Check.
• Write about it on your blog: Check.

Be sure to link me if you use this information! Muah!

Top 5 of the Moment [PW]

Posted by D-Mac at 02:02 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Finally, my take on the controversy

Okay, so everybody's all up in arms about the big controversy in this month's Philadelphia magazine. And, well, being a blogger and a newspaper writer, and a lifetime media critic, I figured I can give an interesting look as to how this would actually get published.

After the jump, my full take.

A movie filmed in L.A. featuring stock footage from Pittsburgh -- which is like a Midwest (or AFC Central, if you will) version of Trenton -- is No. 15 on the best Philly movies of all time? For shame, Philadelphia! I really thought I could expect better from you guys. It's like calling Boy Meets World the best television show about Philadelphia.

And don't get me started on your B- review of Stephen A. Smith's Quite Frankly.

Posted by D-Mac at 12:29 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Penn kids: still learning about that 'World Wide Web' thing

We don't want to say Penn kids aren't the sharpest knives in the drawer, but...

With a senior-society application due the next day, College senior Neha Sharma faced one last challenge: her e-mail.

Set to leave town, Sharma would not have access to e-mail for the weekend, but her School of Arts and Sciences e-mail account refused to cooperate that Friday evening. Again.

After Sharma had tried several times for two hours, her e-mail, which she accesses through a Web browser "was definitely not working," she said.

Jesus Christ, has anyone ever heard of Hotmail? Or any of the other million free web-based e-mail services?

Also, this is the most dramatic lede to a news article I think I've ever read.

Problems add up with SAS e-mail server [DP]
List of webmail service providers [Wikipedia]

Posted by D-Mac at 11:48 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Insert John Kerry joke here

Maybe Metro is the choice of young Philadelphians. Young, stupid Philadelphians.

Also, we hear there's a copy editor position open at the Metro.

U.S. Editions [Metro]

Posted by D-Mac at 11:42 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Oh, Daily News, please don't ever go

Joe Natoli better never shut down the Daily News. No other newspaper in the world would have this great of an item:

Howard Eskin is happy to acknowledge the resemblance between himself and the Burger King in the fast food chain's recent TV spots. "The fact they call him the king even accentuates the connection too," says the 610 WIP sports yakker.

"It's flattering, now I'm on national television," says the self-proclaimed King of Bling.

Eskin says he's "sure the food is delicious, but I'm not a fast food guy." We e-mailed Eskin's picture to Burger King's corporate office yesterday but execs declined to comment on any resemblance.

The side-by-side comparison, courtesy of the DN:

Maybe Eskin can hire Richard Sprague to sue Burger King for stealing his likeness.

Update: According to PhillyEdge, PhillyBurbs had this last week.

Burger King of Bling? [DN, third item]

Posted by D-Mac at 10:20 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Ooh, you're turning us on, Daily News

The Daily News: The Subtle People Paper.

Jackpot priest in D.A.'s perv report [DN]

Posted by D-Mac at 09:23 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Recap of last night's Philadelphia Phillies baseball match against the New York Metropolitans

Aw, forget it. It's too depressing. Here's a puppy:

Much better.

Photo by Mike C Peck via Flickr
Mets 3, Phillies 2 [AP via Yahoo!]

Posted by D-Mac at 09:00 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Priests vs. Rigali: Hey, you're making us look worse

When I was little(-ish), the Catholic Church told everyone not to see the movie The Last Temptation of Christ. But the guy who ran the local movie store said that all the priests from Archbishop Ryan were there renting it anyway, interested in viewing it.

A small revolt, but one nonetheless. And now, some priests are letting the Cardinal have it:

Priests attending the meeting at the chapel of St. Charles Borromeo Seminary in Wynnewood said afterward that Rigali told them that "mistakes were made" by the archdiocese in its handling of abusers and victims.

But, "nobody's perfect... . No one is without sin," Rigali reportedly added. His remarks, which echoed those he has made since the report was issued one week ago, reportedly irked some of the priests, who told him so.

One pastor took to the microphone to say he was "greatly disappointed in the archdiocese's weak and deplorable" defense of Cardinals John Krol and Anthony J. Bevilacqua.

The criticism was greeted with scattered applause, sources said.

Oh snap! What's next, an apology from the late Ron White?

Priests reportedly chastise cardinal [Inky]

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September 27, 2005

Philly Blogicized: All about computers

• Atrios' commentary on the new iTunes -- "Fix it." -- better or worse than "Fuck Bush"? Either way, it got 630 comments. [Eschaton]

• Concerned that Wireless Philadelphia was going to be all rainbows and butterflies and ruin this town's pay-to-play schtick? Don't worry, be corrupt-y! [Philebrity]

• I'm down with House PA-08, 'cuz I used to live there, but the real fun is in the comments: "Reading your own blog, however, would be my first suggestion before you accuse your readers of 'fabrication.'" Oh snap! [MyDD]

• Oh, the controversy: All Spin Zone responds to Phillymag: "Stephen Poaches never foresaw a minority woman from West Philly mattering to the police or the media... [a]nd if not for the attention that Latoyia's case received, she and her unborn baby would still be decomposing in an overgrown Chester, Pa. vacant lot." Now that you've stopped laughing, can't we all just agree that bloggers and magazine columnists suck and move on? [All Spin Zone]

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Damn near killed 'em!

From today's Herb Denenberg ("The Advocate") column in The Evening Bulletin:

This man knows everything.

Am I on the sucker list? [Bulletin, print only]

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Trenton makes, muggers attack stumbling drunks and take

Everybody knows that if you combined Philadelphia and New York, you'd get a shithole.

Everybody also knows that if you combined Philly and NYC, you'd get Trenton.

Well, the sad son of Jersey has done a little bit of clever thinking recently, dressing up police officers as stumbling drunks and arresting people who try to rob them:

Seven muggers, including one who was an escapee from state prison, have been nabbed in a police operation in which undercover officers act as helpless drunken men.

The covert operation began earlier this month as part of an effort to crack down on crimes of opportunity, according to Trenton police.

Two men were arrested this past weekend after they robbed what they thought was a stumbling, intoxicated man -- but the "victim" was really undercover officer Yem Delgado Jr.

My question: how do you tell a helpless drunken man from a regular Trenton resident?

Ba-ZING!

Booze ruse nabs thugs: Operation uses officers as prey to bust criminals [Trentonian]

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Roundup: When blogs and media battle, nobody wins

• Oooh, oooh, here is a fun game! What will be more annoying: Noel Weyrich's anti-blog rant in Philadelphia or bloggers' responses. Hmm, well one dude in Attytood's comment section wished that Weyrich would die (scroll down, it's there somewhere), so we have an early leader.

• Also in this month's Phillymag, ex-PW scribe J-Press waxes chick literatic in a profile of Jennifer Weiner, who we think is reaching Koontzian levels of ubiquitousness.

• Salon on the intelligent design trial in Harrisburg. People danced around the parents doing a monkey dance recently. No, really.

• Protesters who said they suffered from taking Paxil want GlaxoSmithKline to recall the product. Yeah, because a bunch of people walking around suffering from Paxil withdrawal is really a good idea.

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Lenny Dykstra, financial consultant

When he's not being a retired baseball player or running his own car wash in Southern California, former Phillies centerfielder and anti-chewing tobacco activist Lenny Dykstra is writing a column called "Nails on the Numbers" for TheStreet.com.

He's doing stock picks.

Yes, that's right -- even though it makes about as much sense as Randall Cunningham giving advice on how to change a tire or Charles Barkley telling you how to best eat tofu, Nails is dishing fiscal advice.

And Dykstra's big advice? Well, after a Billy Joel lyric, he tells you how hard his job is.

In addition to being a musical genius, the "Piano Man" evidently understands baseball, too. In my present role, I continue to have a greater appreciation for the pressure faced by the pundits who give stock advice. I feel that pressure mounting, as the market has become a minefield in recent weeks.

Whoo! Yes, Lenny, you're really under a lot of pressure. Oh, wait: who is actually going to listen to you stock tips? Well, you do have that great find of this small company called "Yahoo!" Hey, Lenny, there's this software start-up called "Microsoft," how about you look into them and maybe recommend them next column?

Lenny's closing lines are excellent, too:

Despite the monumental expectations and the crushing pressure, athletes would do well to remember The Godfather Part II, in which Hyman Roth declares to Michael Corleone, "Michael, this is the business we have chosen."

Life is a journey; enjoy the ride!

Lenny Dykstra: giving financial as well as life advice. Damn, they might as well just give him a doctorate in psychology.

via When Lenny Dkystra speaks, people listen [Deadspin]
Nails on the Numbers: The heat is on [TheStreet.com]

Posted by D-Mac at 01:04 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

Changes for PWD readers

Oh, fuck you, Metro.

U.S. Editions [Metro]

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'Rocky' statue: a cool mil

Terrell Owens' NFC Championship ring not enough for you? Not interested in, say, Pat Burrell's horrible outfits? Or the clothes Ed Delahanty was in when he died falling over Niagara Falls? (Note: We're not sure these are for sale, but we'd take bets they will be some day.) Are you Joe Natoli?

Either way, you can purchase your very own Rocky Statue, currently for sale on eBay. The 700 Level clued us on to this one, saying that it'd be better if people were auctioning off Paulie's robot. Perhaps. (Okay, definitely.)

But this is a one-of-a-kind item! Okay, a three of a kind item, since the original artist made three casts of the bronze Sly Stallone, with the one shifting around at various locations in the city until finally settling in front of the Spectrum.

And it's got history, too: It's been in Philadelphia! It's been in Mannequin! It out-acted Andrew McCarthy!

And, the best selling point for the statue, is, of course, this line from the auction (proceeds go to the International Institute for Sport and Olympic History):

A portion of the money from the purchase of the Rocky statue will go to the Boxing Endowment.

BID now -- BID high -- find a place to erect ROCKY.

Heh, heh.

Rocky statue, #3 of 3 [eBay]
Own the Rocky Statue [The 700 Level]

Posted by D-Mac at 11:16 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

Something to cheer you up after last night's Phillies game

Stupid Phillies.

Aww, puppy!

Photo by basykes via Flickr
Mets 6, Phillies 5 [AP via Yahoo!]

Posted by D-Mac at 10:59 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

I want answers

Sometimes the Bucks County Courier Times' crime log is detailed:

300 block Rosewood Ave., Feasterville, 11:32 p.m., Sun, 40-ounce bottle of "Hurricane" malt liquor thrown at 1996 Ford Explorer, bug guard damaged, $50 value.

Wow, they even have the brand of malt liquor thrown at the car. Here's another report from Lower Southampton:

Castle Garden Center, 100 block E. Bristol Rd., pumpkin smashed in roadway.

That's it? How many pieces did it break into? How big was it? What color was it? Details, people, details!

Public safety log 09.27.05 [BCCT]

Posted by D-Mac at 09:58 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

In Bucks County, they love their Halloween

The front page of PhillyBurbs.com promises a lot today. Check out this link:

And what is inside this greatest Halloween site on the entire Web?

Lucky seven, my children. For seven years now we have festered in the blackness of Internet ether, growing and eclipsing every Halloween site on the web. And now, 1,300 pages strong, we've burst forward with a line up that defies even our real world paper competitors.

Hell, this is the greatest site about anything on the Web.

The greatest Halloween site on the Web [PhillyBurbs.com]

Posted by D-Mac at 09:10 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Campaign: Stop Baer and Grogan!

Frankly, our fat cat columnists have done it for too long, and it's time to get them to stop.

Daily News columnist John Baer and Inquirer columnist John Grogan have written approximately 450,000 words on the legislature's pay raise since it passed over the summer. They both have a column on it today.

I urge everyone to write their columnists telling them that they won't accept any more stories about the pay raises, and to vote against them in the next columnist election.

Let's make it a clean sweep: stop fat cat columnists from writing about the pay raise!

Oh, and John Baer, writing "piss" in your column doesn't make it edgy, especially if it's edited to say "p---." (Byko can get "asshole" into the paper; perhaps you can ask him about how to avoid being censored.)

Protestors ask: Where's Perzel? [Inky]
Protestors 'oink' lawmakers [DN]

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The more you know

You know, I learn something every day by reading all the news sources I have to follow for my job. Today, I learned that if you're robbed, you should put away all your drug paraphernalia before calling the cops:

At about 10:45 p.m. Thursday night, a resident of 4116 Spruce St. called Penn Police to report a robbery.

Joshua Trisdorfer, who is not affiliated with Penn, said that a gun-toting robber had entered his apartment, forced the tenant and two acquaintances to the floor and stolen $1,000 in cash, which had been left on a table.

When police were let inside the apartment, they immediately saw drugs and related paraphernalia in plain view. They proceeded to search the remainder of the apartment for contraband, eventually netting a large quantity of marijuana and Adderall -- a prescription stimulant that is frequently abused.

In addition, officers found packaging materials and other evidence that the drugs were intended for redistribution.

As a result of their findings, police arrested Trisdorfer, 21, on charges of drug possession and possession with intent to deliver.

Oh, really? He's not a Penn student? Are you sure, officers?

Police: Drugs sold from local house [DP]

Posted by D-Mac at 08:39 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack

September 26, 2005

Philly Blogicized: We're growing tired of the 'blogicized' joke

• Bernard Hopkins disses that other D-Mac, Donovan McNabb. Really, a boxer criticizing another athlete? Well I never! [Johnny Goodtimes]

• Man, this du